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Archive for February 15th, 2007

Ahem…American Greetings…? This Is How The Pros Do It

Posted by scott on February 15th, 2007

Successful abstract portraiture ignores the deceptive surface, instead combining seemingly disparate elements to reveal the soul of one’s subject.  So it is with good Photoshoppery.  Clumsily dubbing a dog collar and leash onto DNC Chairman Howard Dean does little to convincingly evoke the hidden wellspring of the former governor’s personality, since anyone with sufficient ego and energy to run for President is unlikely to have either the time or the patience to spend all day washing a woman’s foot with his tongue.  On the other hand, if the image had featured Dick Morris, I would have bought two.

Gavin from Sadly, No! shows us how it’s done, with a Photoshopped portrait of AG Interactive President Josef Mandalbaum that does not rely upon superficial distortion, but allows the inner man to explosively burst forth.  And then be sopped up by a giant bipedal paper towel roll infused with unholy life.

Sure, it’s a little highbrow for an e-greeting card, but I have no doubt that Gavin would be willing to sell out for the right price.  Blue Mountain?  Ball’s in your court…

George W. Bush and Anna Nichole Smith: Separated At Birth?

Posted by scott on February 15th, 2007

I’m reminded of this because for the thirty-forty seconds of Wednesday’s press conference I could stomach I was thinking, “These people asking the questions are employed by the same people who think I’m fascinated by all things Dead Anna Nicole! And they’re the same people who tried to tell me that the spastic megalomaniac at the podium is someone I’d Like To Have A Beer With.

Must read words o’ wisdom from Mr. Riley.