Okay, I was going to start “The World O’Crap” ministry after learning from the AFA how easy it is. (And I may still do it if the author of the “Start Your Own Ministry” series ever reveals the really important thing he’s been holding over my head.)

But after reading recent news reports, I’ve decided that “World O’Crap: The Reality Show” is the way to go. Sure, it will go against all the principles of decency, decorum, and taste that I was raised with, but hey, there’s money involved! Note these recent news stories.

First, there were the reports that Bristol and Levi got engaged as a way to parlay their tale of teen abstinence into a big payday.

Reportedly, Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston want to put their relationship directly in the public’s eye with their own reality TV show and upcoming wedding. Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston are not shopping just one show, but trying to milk what they’ve got and have multiple reality shows in the works that they are reportedly trying to get networks interested in.

“Within the next four to six weeks Palin’s PR people will be releasing news that Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston have signed on to ‘star’ in a new reality TV show, all about young parenting. And yes, they will also work up to a wedding,” reported from a commentator who calls himself “Levinews.”

Bristol Palin recently appeared on TV in a cameo on ‘The Secret Life of the American Teenager,’ and reportedly also recently signed on for a public speaking appearances where she will give speeches on abstinence and “pro-life” issues, among other subjects. Reportedly, Bristol Palin will earn between $15,000 and $30,000 per appearance.

You know, having that out-of-wedlock child to gain her creds as an abstinence expert was the smartest thing Bristol has ever done.

Now, there are reports that they are currently shooting “Kate Plus Eight Plus Sarah Plus Grizzly Adams.” It’s a great day to be alive!

TLC’s retooled ‘Kate Plus Eight’ is pulling out all the stops for an upcoming episode — including a big cameo by former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin, a source tells In Touch magazine. And with Palin’s upcoming docu-reality TV show set to run on the same network, it’s potentially a great opportunity for cross-promotion.

Gosselin and her eight kids have made the trip to Alaska and will be meeting up with Palin for a camping trip. Palin’s dad, a retired science teacher, and her brother, a third-grade teacher, will do a hands-on natural history lesson for the kids, 9-year-old twins Mady and Cara, and 6-year-old sextuplets Aaden, Joel, Collin, Leah, Hannah and Alexis.

We did such a good job finding better names for the Gurdonites — you think that we can help out the Gosselin Gang? The floor is open to your suggestions.

The former Vice Presidential candidate is reportedly excited for the visit and camping trip. “She’s excited because it will be fun and educational for the children. Sarah will even teach Kate how to avoid bears!” In Touch’s source said.

Um, I’m not going to touch that line … but you feel free to give it your best shot!

“A friendship is unlikely” after they finish taping their segment, our source says, adding “with Kate, out of sight means out of mind. She hasn’t spoken with Tony her dancing partner from ‘Dancing With the Stars’ since she last stepped onto the dancefloor.”

Plus, Sarah is reportedly very unlikable and Kate is a big control freak, so if they spent time together after the cameras were off, somebody would probably die in a “freak hunting accident.” Sure, then the network could call in the cops from “Law & Order: Wingnut Division,” but nobody has gotten back to me on that idea. So, I guess it’s best that the two woman agree to diss each other on Twitter after the filming is through.

But tell me about the money!

Palin will reportedly earn over $1 million per episode for the eight-part series exploring the natural beauty of Alaska. It will be produced by Mark Burnett (who created Survivor and Celebrity Apprentice). Her program, Sarah Palin’s Alaska, is expected to air later this summer.

So, as I was saying, I think that this reality show business is the way to go for World O’Crap. I, being an astronaut/spy would be a natural. I’ll allow Scott and Mary to come up with their own reality personas. And of course you, the Wo’C posse, will be part of the series. Share what you think your role should be, and maybe we’ll share some of that $1 million an ep with you.

Tinsel Town Talk | 23 Comments »

If you want to see Victoria perform her viral video “There’s a Communist in the White House and Bats in My Belfry,” there’s a link to it at Above Top Secret. And if you’re not curious enough to actually subject yourself to her warblings, they also have the lyrics posted there. Here’s a sample:

Now, you may say, do I have any evidence
To support my supposition
And I will say where do you want me to start?
His Grand parents were Socialists,
his mother was, his father was a Communist
He had Marxist professors,
He taught a course in college on Saul Alinsky
He, uh, well his college records are sealed,
He told um Joe the Plumber on the campaign trail, “spread the wealth”
Which is a direct quote from the Communist Manifesto written by karl Marx and that other guy.

Um, yeah.

And in other celebrity news, AOL’s welcome screen just informed me that Mel Gibson Under Investigation for Domestic Violence. See, you start smacking around Jesus and something like this is just bound to follow.

Here’s a bit from that story for you:

Last week, audio tapes of Gibson screaming obscenities at Grigorieva were made public, according to TMZ.com.

[...]

Both celebrity websites report that the tapes contain phrases such as “You look like a f*king pig in heat and if you get raped by a pack of ni**ers it will be your fault.”

Remember better times when we thought he was only crazy prejudiced against the Jews?

Tinsel Town Talk | 9 Comments »

Dateline: The Grove! Store: Barnes and Nobles! Why: A fictional TV character wrote a book! Who: Nathan Fillion!

How:  First off, you need to know a secret about me.  I’m a geek.  I know it comes as a shock, but there it is.  Part of being a geek is loving you some Joss Whedon.  And (if you’re a geek like me) you are a huge fan of Joss Whedon’s Firefly and Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog.  And (if you’re a geek and a girl like me) you have a huge crush on Nathan Fillion (Firefly’s Malcolm Reynolds and Dr. Horrible’s Capt. Hammer). And if you have a huge crush on Nathan Fillion, you watch ABCs Castle every Monday at 10 pm.

So. Castle.  It’s a lighthearted procedural crime show, in which Nathan Fillion plays famous crime novelist, Richard Castle.  To promote the show, ABC decided to put out an actual mystery novel written by the fictitious Richard Castle.  And to promote the heck out of it, ABC decided to have Nathan Fillion go to bookstores and autograph the novels written by his fictitious character from the show.

I got to go to one of those signings.  It. Was. AWESOME!

He is every bit as hunky, handsome, and charming as you might imagine him to be!  He’s a sharp dresser and tells great stories about the HIGHlarious hi-jinx which occur on the set of a TV series.

Once he had talked a bit about the show, and answered many questions posed by adoring fans, it was time for him to sign the books his fictional character wrote.  (I should point out that the book is more of an ultra slim novella, and it’s a total “Mary Sue” about Richard Castle writing himself into his own story, and as Scott remarked, is the sort of thing that should come from a Happy Meal rather than a book store.  Anyway…)

I waited in line and once I got to the signing table, I made sure to let him know how talented I thought he was, how much I enjoyed the show, and how much I enjoyed his work in the past.  I also gave him a very rare signed edition of Better Living Through Bad Movies! (If you don’t have one, you should buy one!  Nathan Fillion has one, and he’s super cool. So be cool like him, and get !)

He accepted the book and signed the fake novel by the made-up author, and then shook my hand, thanking me for coming and for being a fan.

And here’s where the tale turns tragic.  You see, the next morning I woke up deathly ill.  Fever, cold symptoms, and vomiting.

I had Swine Flu.

And, because I shook his hand, Nathan Fillion — and now probably the entire cast of Castle – also has Swine Flu.

Sorry about that, Nathan. My bad.  Get well soon!

Tinsel Town Talk | 13 Comments »

The Owlship is a powerful crimefighting juggernaut, as long as it doesn’t get moist.

Later, workers put one of those vinyl sports car bras over the front grille.

Tinsel Town Talk | 1 Comment »

Over at Pajamas Media, John “Dirty Harry” Nolte is like a kid on Christmas Eve, trembling and giddy in anticipation of David Zucker arriving to lay waste all of Hollywood with jokes about Michael Moore’s unhealthful BMI.

In just this past year, counting both narratives and documentaries, we’ve seen nearly a dozen, high profile anti-Iraq War films and not a single one has made a profit or argued the other side.

Any decent anti-war movie is going to give equal time to promoting the pro-war side, because drama is conflict. (Note:  Equal Time provisions do not apply to AM Talk Radio.)  Besides, if Americans really hated the Iraq War, they’d eschew escapist fare like Iron Man and The Dark Knight, and spend their summer entertainment dollars watching movies that remind them how hateful the war they hate is.  And 7-Eleven would have offered its Rendition Big Gulp in the 64 and not just the 32 ounce size.

Unless it’s to inspire their annual cinematic treatise to all things them — the annual film decrying the 1950s blacklist which forced a few screenwriters to use a pseudonym –

Bunch’a babies.  John uses a pseudonyn when he blogs, and you don’t hear him whining about it.  Anyway, I’m probably not qualified to comment, since I missed this year’s big studio film decrying the blacklist.  And last year’s, too.  In fact, the most recent movie I can remember that even used the blacklist as a plot point was 2001′s The Majestic, but it’s entirely possible that the anti-Blacklist propaganda in The Hottie and the Nottie flew right over my head.

— present-day liberal Hollywood doesn’t much care for the word “blacklist,” especially when it’s them being accused of doing the blacklisting.  Their defense is to hide behind the literal and claim there is no actual blacklist or organized conspiracy to keep openly conservative filmmakers from getting work.

They hide their reluctance to produce Dirty’s movies behind feeble, transparent euphemisms like “trite melodrama,” “steaming, witless ejecta,” and “Good grief, how is it possible for any single person to suck this much without the assistance of a Shop-Vac?!”

Fine.

Okay, then.  Dirty goes on the recount how Hollywood leftists conspired to stop Mel Gibson’s (pre-Sugar Tits, and ante-anti-Semitic tirade) masterpiece, The Passion of the Christ.

…the goal was therefore two-fold: to hurt the movie financially (which obviously failed), but also to launch a pre-emptive strike against any filmmaker thinking about following Gibson’s lead and scampering off the liberal Hollywood plantation.

I thought that problem was settled by the Supreme Court in Dredd Scott v. Columbia/Screen Gems Home Entertainment.

The Passion may be the only film to make over a half-billion dollars and not create a me-too phenomenon.

Not one other major star belonging to a splinter Catholic cult run by his father, the Pope of Malibu, opted to spend millions of dollars of his own money to make an Aramaic language fetish video about beating up Jesus.  If that’s not a blacklist I don’t know what is.

A more tolerant industry, or at least one driven by financial considerations, would’ve quickly greenlit a serious-minded sequel based on the Acts of the Apostles.

If only Hollywood was more focused on the bottom line, we could be in a movie theater right now, enjoying Sister Acts of the Apostles II:  The Cock Crows At Midnight.

Reasonable people would call this a form of “blacklisting,” but liberal Hollywood isn’t reasonable and rather than have an honest discussion on the matter they instead wrap us ’round the axle of specificity when it comes to the word “blacklist. ”

They also insist on inflating the Tires of Proper Definition.

So let’s use another word: Passioning.

Well, the metaphors weren’t working out, so I guess we might as well try neologisms.  But let’s start by defining our crappy, made-up terms:

“Passioning” is what happens when the leftist Hollywood establishment, using whatever power available, demean, dismiss, diminish, and defame those they consider an ideological apostate. In 2004 it was Mel Gibson and The Passion of the Christ; today it’s director David Zucker and An American Carol.

According to Dirty, various bloggers have reacted with muted enthusiasm to The Passion of the Zucker, implying that a film in which Michael Moore “finds political clarity at the smoking ruins of the World Trade Center while the admonishing ghost of George Washington (played by Jon Voight) hovers nearby” may not provide the sort of rollicking, laugh-a-minute thrill ride that readers of internet spoiler sites legitimately expect.

Thus, like Red Channels, the Army-McCarthy Hearings, and the House Un-American Activities Committee, the iron heel of CHUD.com and Ain’t It Cool News grinds another artist into the dust for the crime of standing up and declaring, “I am not a number!  I am a free man!… By the way, how’re the weekend numbers?”

Tinsel Town Talk | 23 Comments »

Our old friend Andrew Klavan (see here) has emerged from the cineplex with a trembling sense of awe; he has stumbled to his knees, cast his moist, yearning eyes heavenward, and seen a revelation glowing from the underbelly of the sky…

A cry for help goes out from a city beleaguered by violence and fear: A beam of light flashed into the night sky, the dark symbol of a bat projected onto the surface of the racing clouds . . .

Oh, wait a minute. That’s not a bat, actually. In fact, when you trace the outline with your finger, it looks kind of like . . . a “W.”

Yes, Andrew has jumped on the meme-wagon and joined other conservative cineastes in declaring that George W. Bush is Super-President!

There seems to me no question that the Batman film “The Dark Knight,” currently breaking every box office record in history, is at some level a paean of praise to the fortitude and moral courage that has been shown by George W. Bush in this time of terror and war.

Well, there’s no question as long as the movie remains popular.  If it had debuted to the kind of notices and box office that, say, Batman and Robin did, I doubt the Conservateriate would be hugging it to their bodies and screaming, “Mine!  Mine!  Mine!” like Daffy Duck hoarding a mound of jewels in Ali Baba Bunny.

Like W, Batman is vilified and despised for confronting terrorists in the only terms they understand. Like W, Batman sometimes has to push the boundaries of civil rights to deal with an emergency, certain that he will re-establish those boundaries when the emergency is past.

Of course, if you can make an emergency last long enough (did that Terrorist Color Swatch Chart ever drop below fuchsia?) then blown boundaries become the norm and you don’t have to restore squat.  And unlike W, at least The Batman lost a little sleep over using the Constitution as a mud-butler.

And like W, Batman understands that there is no moral equivalence between a free society — in which people sometimes make the wrong choices — and a criminal sect bent on destruction. The former must be cherished even in its moments of folly; the latter must be hounded to the gates of Hell.

Or you can split the difference and drop the “free” part, then everybody can knock off early and meet for Long Island Iced Teas and Double-Stuffed Potato Skins at Bennigan’s.  We can just Fed-Ex the rest of your civil rights to Hell in the morning…I’ll leave a note on Jerri’s desk.

“The Dark Knight,” then, is a conservative movie about the war on terror.  And like another such film, last year’s “300,” “The Dark Knight” is making a fortune depicting the values and necessities that the Bush administration cannot seem to articulate for beans.

Maybe they should fire Dana Perino and hire Frank Miller.  Forget press conferences, and just issue all Presidential statements in comic book form.  I mean, they’re already halfway there; just install a fireman’s pole, a super-computer, and a giant penny in Cheney’s Secure Undisclosed Location, and you’ve got instant Bat Cave.  Get someone from DC or Marvel to design uniforms — we already know Bush enjoys dressing up in costumes — and get David Frum working on a catchphrase.  Not only would this finally restore a bit of honor and dignity to the White House, it would be revenue-neutral, since all costs could be defrayed by merchandising deals and cross-promotional tie-ins with Burger King.

Conversely, time after time, left-wing films about the war on terror — films like “In The Valley of Elah,” “Rendition” and “Redacted” — which preach moral equivalence and advocate surrender, that disrespect the military and their mission, that seem unable to distinguish the difference between America and Islamo-fascism, have bombed more spectacularly than Operation Shock and Awe.

Why is it then that left-wingers feel free to make their films direct and realistic, whereas Hollywood conservatives have to put on a mask in order to speak what they know to be the truth? Why is it, indeed, that the conservative values that power our defense — values like morality, faith, self-sacrifice and the nobility of fighting for the right — only appear in fantasy or comic-inspired films like “300,” “Lord of the Rings,” “Narnia,” “Spiderman 3″ and now “The Dark Knight”?

Wow.  This takes the art of the rhetorical question to a whole new level, doesn’t it?

When heroes arise who take those difficult duties on themselves, it is tempting for the rest of us to turn our backs on them, to vilify them in order to protect our own appearance of righteousness. We prosecute and execrate the violent soldier or the cruel interrogator in order to parade ourselves as paragons of the peaceful values they preserve.

Well, we railroad obscure, powerless underlings while insulating management from accountability, but sure, I get your point.

As Gary Oldman’s Commissioner Gordon says of the hated and hunted Batman, “He has to run away — because we have to chase him.”

That’s real moral complexity.

And real fruit flavor!

And when our artistic community is ready to show that sometimes men must kill in order to preserve life; that sometimes they must violate their values in order to maintain those values; and that while movie stars may strut in the bright light of our adulation for pretending to be heroes, true heroes often must slink in the shadows, slump-shouldered and despised — then and only then will we be able to pay President Bush his due and make good and true films about the war on terror.

Perhaps that’s when Hollywood conservatives will be able to take off their masks and speak plainly in the light of day.

Hell, I’d be satisfied if they’d just start by taking off the two wetsuits and pulling the dildoes out of their ass.  At least during business hours.

So I guess the lesson is, conservatives aren’t biologically capable of producing good, popular movies, but they’re certainly eager to adopt them as their own.  Which I guess makes them the moral equivalent of a married gay couple with a nesting instinct.

President Bush in the upcoming summer blockbuster, Super President vs. The G-8!

Tinsel Town Talk | 25 Comments »

No. Really. You Need To See It.

What?! You’re still here?!! Go. Just go see it, for the love of Stan Lee go see it!! And for the Love of All That is Good and GEEKY–STAY THROUGH THE END OF THE CREDITS.

Movies, Tinsel Town Talk, Video Village | 8 Comments »

Since I’m on strike, enjoined from writing, revising, or even pitching stories, I thought I’d take this opportunity to see what it’s like to sit on the other side of the table by taking a meeting with some of Townhall’s finest minds.  Let me just check iCal here and…ah!  My two o’clock is some guy named Milton Medved, who’s coming in to pitch his idea about how America is totally awesome if you just ignore all the parts that aren’t.

Victoria, hold my calls…Go ahead Melvin…

Critics of the United States and its role in the world prefer to argue their point of view by focusing on specific instances of American bullying or brutality, recounting their favorite horror stories from Indonesia or Nicaragua, Vietnam or Chile, the Philippines or Iraq –

Hey, let me stop you for just a sec.  Wouldn’t your average Joe Sixpack say, “Hey, that’s a pretty long list of brutality and horror.  Aren’t you kind of making the critics’ case for ‘em?”  I thought this was a life-affirming, feel-good story about American exceptionalism…?

or any of two dozen other places around the globe where American intervention or involvement imperfectly exemplified the nation’s self-professed high ideals.

Okay, let me stop you again.  Instead of “imperfectly exemplifed,” can we say “contradicted,” or “mocked?”  It would just tighten the whole thing up a bit.

These arguments range over two centuries of history to yield abundant examples of American folly, recklessness, even cruelty…

Just a quick question, Morton…We’re the good guys in this thing, right?  Because fashionable cynicism doesn’t sell tickets, this ain’t 1974…

The leftist insistence on concentrating on individual examples of U.S. “perfidy” emphasizes details over destiny, arcane disputes over isolated, long-ago blunders above big picture considerations of the overall impact of U.S. policy.

I like the destiny angle, that’s good, keep that.  Very Luke Skywalker.

Yes, it’s possible to argue that the United States (and our British allies) harmed democratic development (and our own long-term interests) by undermining the leftist Mossadegh government in Iran in 1953, but that doesn’t justify (or even explain) the current Iranian designation of the U.S. as “The Great Satan”…

Tell me about it!  When I started in this business, there were maybe three or four producers, tops, on any series.  Now there’s like five EPs alone.  It’s ridiculous!  Half of them are just managers who rep the lead actors; they’ve never even been on the set!  I can maybe see calling the U.S. “the li’l devil” or maybe “The Great Asshole,” but c’mon.  That Mossadegh thing was 50 years ago!  What’ve you done to me lately?

In the same sense, skeptical military historians might dismiss General George Washington as an inept tactician and inferior leader of men who lost nearly every battle he fought, without acknowledging that after eight years he won a seemingly impossible victory against the world’s greatest power. 

Okay.  Okay, I see where you’re going…So it’s like George W. Bush is also an inept tactician and inferior leader of men who’s lost every war he’s fought, but if we give him eight years he’ll pull out a seemingly impossible victory at the last moment against one of the world’s weakest powers.  It’s like an allegory!

Those who insist on slandering the United States seek ugly close-ups of twisted trees but won’t step back to consider the forest. They lack perspective, and ignore context.

So we should stick with the master shot here so the audience can’t get a good look at the crappy effects… 

They refer to dwell on the harsh impact of specific American initiatives or policies, without acknowledging the Republic’s undeniably benevolent and beneficial impact on the world at large during every era in our history.

Right, right.  And then as soon as he says “undeniably benevolent impact,” some smart ass says, “yeah, tell that to the Navajo,” or whoever, and it’s all like, ZING!

ALLIGNMENT WITH AMERICA BENEFITS, RATHER THAN BURDENS, THE NATIONS OF THE WORLD

Whoa, Murray, I like your energy, but don’t go all Bring It On with the spirit fingers, ‘kay?

The strongest, most direct evidence against the indictment of the Untied States as a destructive, callous imperial power comes from a consideration of the progress of those nations most closely involved with the United States. 

Good point.  I think we should throw in some stuff about Iraq and Afghanistan here, because who’s more closely involved with us than they people we’re occupying?  I see it as kind of a wacky, Perfect Strangers kind of thing, where the American guy is a well-meaning but clueless lug, and the foreign guy has a funny accent, and some kind of catch-phrase, and he gets gunned down every week at a checkpoint.

The phrase “The Yanks are Coming! The Yanks are Coming!” (featured in George M. Cohan’s stirring World War I rabble-rouser “Over There”) most often signaled a nation’s immediate liberation and never meant its long-term destruction or conquest.

Except for all the Indian nations.  And Hawaii.  And that half of Mexico we took. But we did give back the Phillipines. And we only took a tiny slice of Cuba, and they probably don’t even want that back, ’cause it’s filled with terrorists now.

Otto von Bismarck might boast of building his German Reich on the basis of “blood and iron,” but the United States consistently viewed its international mission in deeply Christian, messianic terms.

Right, right…Say, Monte, let me just stop you there for a second — don’t want to interrupt your flow — but how long is this pitch?  4,437 words?  Really…?  Okay I’ve got a thing at Craft in like five minutes, so how about you just cut to the chase?

As George Bailey’s view of an alternate reality convinced him “It’s a Wonderful Life,” even the briefest contemplation of a world without America should persuade us that “It’s a Wonderful Nation” – in fact, the Republic rightly recognized as the Greatest Nation on God’s Green Earth.

Okay!  Well, thanks for coming in, Maurice.  Great meeting you.  I’ll kick your leave-behind upstairs, and we’ll be in touch.

Um, Victoria, who’s out in the waiting room?  Andrew Tallman?  Haven’t a clue.  Just send him in and get me a Bling H2O.

Okay, Andy, is it?  What’ve you got?

How to Have a Great Wife.

Kind of a Tyler Perry thing, huh?  Are we appealing to a primarily urban audience here, or is this thing gonna have crossover appeal?

“He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord,” and he who nourishes a wife preserves a good thing and maintains the favor of the Lord.

Kind of going for the flyover niche.  Beautiful…

Your obligation to represent the love of Jesus in your marriage is a monumentally greater task than your wife’s obligation to represent the submission of the Church.

So it’s sort of a battle of the sexes thing with a little kink to give it an edge, huh?  I like it.  The husbands a bumbling, but good-hearted oaf, and the wife’s long-suffering but hot…?

So, what does it take to have a great wife? Simple. Be a great lord.

Okay, I’m not totally clear on the “lord” angle.  Are we talking Lord of the Dance kind of thing — shirtless dude prancing around — or is it more a Lord of the Rings, fantasy kind of element, boobs and blades…?

And what does it take to be a great lord? Equally simple. Know the needs and desires of your wife and meet them. If you don’t, she will become just the sort of wife you don’t want: nagging, withholding, bitter, and frustrated.

So we’re not talking chick flick here.

God gave you a beautiful flower. He does not expect a dead thorn bush in return. 

Dude, that’s an awesome hook for a horror franchise.

You’d have done better to remain single than to so ruin the beautiful human rose He entrusted to you.

So in your thing, the women are plants?  Are they like Invasion of the Body Snatchers pod people, or walking carrots like James Arness in The Thing, or maybe they’re like that hot druid chick in The Guardian who was schtupping a spruce tree?

So how is this to be accomplished? This is where things get dicey. Willard Harley wrote a very helpful book called “His Needs, Her Needs,” in which he outlines the top needs of women.  They include affection, conversation, honesty and openness, financial support, and family commitment. This is all true. Gary Chapman wrote another helpful book called “The Five Love Languages,” in which he talks about giving love through gifts, quality time, words of encouragement, physical touch, and acts of service. This is also true. Gary Smalley has written books. James Dobson has written books.  

I can see you’ve done your research.  Funny, my second wife always used to tell me, “if you want insight to womens’ most intimate thoughts and desires, ask guys named Willard, Gary, Gary and James.”

And if you follow this simple (and completely unsimple) advice, I suspect you’ll find yourself married to a great wife. At the very least, she’ll appreciate you trying so hard to understand and satisfy her … just like God.

Um, okay, I think that might be a little too edgy.

Tinsel Town Talk, Wingnuts | 15 Comments »

The good folks at the blog, Franklin Ave., visited the fine folks at Blogging.La, and discovered a nifty little sign generator:
Make Your Own Hollywood Sign

Here’s my first offering:

It’s fun to make your own Hollywood Sign! So, put on your creative thinking caps and get to creating! Post your pics and if we like yours the best, we’ll give you lots of positive reinforcement. Or a prize. I haven’t really worked out the details, yet….

Tinsel Town Talk | 23 Comments »

This is how you pitch a movie…if you’re a ninja!

Tinsel Town Talk | 7 Comments »