• Hey! We're on Twitter!

  • Buy The Book!



    Click to Buy The Mug

    Buy The Book

Archive for the 'Can I Peek Under Your Hood?' Category

When I Get Rich, I’m Gonna Buy You Furs, Diamonds, And A Swastika

Posted by scott on October 21st, 2010

I’m very sorry for my lack of posting activity lately (and very grateful to Sheri for picking up the slack), but I unexpectedly produced a sequel to my herniated disc (a long-running smash in 2008) about a week and a half ago, and it’s made sitting at the computer a grump-inducing ordeal. However, I’m heavily medicated at the moment, so let’s exploit this brief respite from lucidity and see what the under-medicated folks at RenewAmerica are raving about today.

Dressing like a WWII German soldier on weekends proves how rich we are, by Warner Todd Huston

First of all, despite all the chest puffing by sports-freaks and rock-music geeks who want to say that Civil War and WWII reenactors are “weird,” the very fact that there are such things as reenactors at all — not to mention sports nuts or music fanatics — is proof that westerners are well off, rich if you will. The existence of Civil War and WWII reenactors is great evidence that the United States is a success.

You can identify a nation of winners by their large population of sore losers.

Warner Todd Huston in undated file photo.

But first, let’s face the facts.

Well, first let’s face a mock firing squad and pretend we’re helpless POWs being gunned down by SS troops, because it’s Malmédy Monday!  Woo hoo!   We’re all going out for beer and pizza after the war crimes.

Civil War and WWII reenactors are not any stranger than people that wear those silly looking bicycling clothes with the pointed hats and the skin-tight little pants.

The fact is, people dress up in facsimile uniforms and pretend to fight on behalf of slavery or genocidal totalitarianism for the exact same reason bicyclists wear shorts: because they don’t want to get their pants caught in the chain.

They are no goofier than those nut cases that paint themselves in their team colors and spend thousands of their hard-earned wages on time-wasting sports games.

Sure.  I can’t tell you how many hours I’ve spent sitting around with my buddies, playing Madden Fort Pillow Massacre on the Xbox.

Reenactors are no stranger than model railroaders

Assuming the HO-enthusiasts hook up little cattle cars to their Lionel locomotives and pretend they’re transporting Jews for “resettlement” in the East.

And that is just the thing, isn’t it? That Americans have so much spare money and time to waste on hobbies really does show how successful we are as a culture.

We’re so filthy rich we can afford to recreate the last war we won just so we can pretend to be the losers.  Seems a bit counterintuitive, but then I suppose it’s no stranger than being a misogynist transvestite.

Put it this way, how many people in poverty-ridden nations can spend $1,000 on a rifle

Well, if you’re a child soldier in, say, the Horn of Africa, they’ll often just give you a rifle.  But I can see where those Americans who, through an accident of birth, were deprived of a chance to commit atrocities would be glad to drop a grand on a Westworld-like simulation.

…or hundreds of dollars on clothing recreating those of 150 years ago or more?

Maybe it’s just me, but I suspect if “Reinhard” Iott had been caught swanning about in a whalebone corset and a hoop skirt instead of an SS uniform, he’d actually be doing better in the polls.

How many poor nations have people that can afford to buy a $2,000 bicycle, or year after year spend thousands on tickets to sporting events? Well, we can and we do.

Yeah, although folks who ride mountain bikes for exercise don’t — as a rule — also sew swastikas onto their Lycra bib shorts and video themselves pedaling around the woods with machineguns and dummy grenades.

Further, Americans aren’t the only ones. Many European nations have their own contingent of reenactors. England has thousands of reenactors of the Napoleonic era — they even reenact the English Civil War and Medieval eras.

And Roundheads are much more offensive than the Gestapo.  In fact, the Medieval Times restaurant chain is considering switching to a Third Reich theme, with the wait staff dressed as death camp inmates, because a lot of people felt the serving wench costumes were kind of tasteless.

But the truth is it is idiotic to assume that every reenactor fully accepts the ideologies, biases, and precepts of the ancients they are recreating. Civil War reenactors are not slavemongers. Germany army reenactors are not Jew killers.

When it comes to slavemongering and Jew killing, those who can, do.  Those who can’t, re-enact.

Can you find some that are a bit goofy here and there? Sure

Unfortunately, they’re mostly found on ballots.

As we know, comparatively speaking Americans are wonderfully rich. Rich enough not to have to worry about living hand to mouth for the most part.

Yes, never in our history have Americans felt richer, or more secure in their jobs.  Say what you want about the quality of Warner’s argument, you can’t argue with this timing.

They have time to indulge their hobbies.

Unemployment is a popular pastime, and I hear eviction is basically the new Hula-Hoop.

They have time to sit and dream of the past

Slavery and the Third Reich don’t have to be Lost Causes…as long as you keep them alive in your heart.

read books about history, or waste time listening to music, play chess, ride a bike just for fun and exercise (instead of it being their only form of transportation)

People who have to ride their bike to work can’t afford to spend the weekend pretending they’re making Lithuanian civilians kneel on the edge of a mass grave and shooting them execution style in the back of the head..

play sports and/or attend sporting events.

I thought this kind of thing was the backbone of American exceptionalism, just as Waterloo was won on the playing fields of Eaton?  Young men are mentally toughened and physically tempered through the healthy rough-and-tumble of amateur sports, preparing themselves for the rigors of school, business, and other competitive environments?  But no, that’s a waste of money and as morally corrupt as wearing bike shorts!  In a wealthy, advanced country, the only proper use of parents’ spare time is in dressing their boys in paramilitary uniforms, infusing them with the martial spirit of their Teutonic forebears, and sending them out to drill and ape infantry maneuvers.  I bet Hitler wishes he’d thought to do that with his Youth.

So, sit back and think for a minute the next time you want to claim that reenactors are “weird.”

You misunderstand me, Warner.  I don’t regard “weird” as a pejorative.  I budget for weird, I embrace weird.  Weird is the default around here.  I merely claim that re-enactors are maladjusted bigots with a crippling fixation on past failures and grievances, who spend a lot of time and money compensating for the undersized Vienna Frank in their jodhpurs.

Ask yourself how weird it is that you can waste so much time on football, or baseball, or music, video games and movies. Then thank your lucky stars that you are an American and you have the free time and money to waste on such extravagances. And pray to God that Democrats don’t lay us so low that we truly are living hand to mouth like the poorest nations are forced to do.

Reenactors truly are a tribute to how great we are.

A nation’s greatness is measured by the strength of her pantomime Nazis.  Or as Charles Wilson put it in 1953, “What’s good for General Burkhalter is good for the country.”

Coach Dave: Do You Hear The Jungle Drums, Fernando?

Posted by scott on September 16th, 2010

You undoubtedly know “Coach” Dave Daubenmire, either from Sadly, No!, or perhaps as the guy who screamed at you to take a lap, then sneered and called you a “lady” until you successfully climbed the rope in the gym.  And for your own sake I certainly hope you got the lead out, because the coach will brook no excuses, whether it be athlete’s foot, menstrual cramps, lazy eye, or psychosomatic Blackness.


Hypochondria—extreme depression of mind or spirits often centered on imaginary physical ailments.

Afro-chondria—extreme depression of mind or spirits often centered on imaginary social ailments

Dichondra–leafy perennial that was a popular substitute for Bermuda grass in Southern California, until homeowners began to notice that their lazy, shiftless lawn was just laying around, collecting welfare.

So, because he is black all of the white people hate him. Is that we are supposed to believe?

Dave sort of leaped into the middle of his diatribe here, but I assume by “he,” the Coach means Obama, or possibly Ruben Studdard.

Even though millions of white Americans voted for Obama we are now fed media reports that white folks are against him because of his skin color.

Well, there were millions of white folks who didn’t vote for Obama in 2008, and it seems likely that any white people who are now “against him because of his skin color” are probably members of the latter group.  At least, that’s what Obama would deduce, if only because he, like Bad, Bad, Leroy Brown, has Occam’s Razor in his shoe.

I actually dislike the “white” side of him even more…

Because people are born black, they can’t help it.  But like homosexuality, turning race traitor is a choice.

and you won’t “you racist” me into an apology. I am sick and tired of seeing race used as an excuse for incompetence.

I understand Coach Dave’s irritation.  It’s unfair that we white people can’t pardon our incompetence with trendy rationalizations like “race,” and have to fall back on threadbare old excuses like “alcoholism,” or, “my dad was president, and I’m a legacy.”

(I suppose it is right about here that I need to throw out the I-am-not-a-racist-disclaimer that the race-hustlers have made part of any discussion about Negroes in America…

I liked Negroes in America, Tony Kushner’s 1975 blaxploitation film, but I just didn’t buy Roy Cohen as the Mack Daddy pimp.

you do remember when they used to call them Negroes, don’t you?

Yes, I believe it was 30 years ago in the United States, and 30 seconds ago in the Daubenmire household.

Well, I refuse to do it…even though the President is one of the few to whom the phrase “Afro” actually applies. It is the “American” part that I am having trouble with.)

“I’m not giving up another word that starts with N!  These people are insatiable!”

I am sure some of you are very uncomfortable right now.

No, I’m good, actually; but then, I planned ahead.  I always said to myself, “if I’m ever invited to a Klan meeting, I’m wearing my 300 count percales.”

That’s ok. You see, I am one of the few dinosaurs remaining in America who have not given over the use of the English language to the thought police. As any good umpire would tell you, I call them as I see them.

…through a glass, darky.

It is time to stop making excuses for “oppressed” blacks. The President of the United States is black.

Which means that no black people are oppressed, and all black people are technically President of the United States, which explains why so many of them drive nice cars.

There are more posters of black athletes hanging on the walls of suburban white kids in America than there are pictures of white guys adorning the walls of black kids in the ghettos.

And despite Mattel’s efforts to meet ghetto-dwellers halfway, only a handful of little Negro girls can be seen playing with new Drop of Blood Barbie.  Sales figures for her sidekick, Stockholm Syndrome Skipper have also been disappointing in inner city areas.

Upwards of ninety percent of blacks voted for a black man for President.

When they could have voted for this guy!

Doesn’t that have a tinge of racism?

And more than a touch of irony, considering McCain’s teeth are “high yellow.”  Joke’s on you, ghetto-denizens!

If ninety percent of white voters had voted for the white guy the African wouldn’t be president. Somebody explain to me how racism has held Obama back.

More importantly, someone explain to the Coach how racism, which has been so effective in holding black people back since the Colonial era, suddenly dropped the ball in 2008.  Was it just a one time case of leaving it in the locker room; racism was having a bad night; it was the kind of thing that could happen to any ism?  Or was cheating involved?  Did racism take a dive because it was in to the Mob for fifty large?  Or were the officials bribed to look the other way, allowing the opposing team to bring in this ringer from Africa?

Isn’t labeling the Tea Party as “racist” stereotyping? I thought that was a bad thing. Heck, we can’t even call the terrorists “Muslim” anymore. Well this is one guy who has had enough of it.

It’s good to see the Coach has finally hit on an effective method of civil disobedience.  Previously, when denied the language of mid-century typology, this one guy threatened to hold his breath until he turned blue.  But nobody cared, and he wound up holding it until he turned navy blue, which in a certain light can be confused with black, and makes it hard to match your socks.  Instead, he will simply refer to himself in the third person until everyone agrees to refer to them as “Negroes,” “Coloreds,” or “decorative blackamoors.”

So, I would like to introduce a new phrase into the American lexicon today.

AFRO-CHONDRIA–the belief that anything bad that happens to a black American is a result of the color of the skin.

I see the Coach has adopted Michael Savage Weiner’s “Liberalism is a Mental Disorder” theory, but refined and expanded it by adding “melanin” to the DSM IV.  This looks like fun, so I hope no one minds if I also toss a neologism into the pot:

LYNCH-PHOBIA–the irrational belief, most often experienced while undergoing an extra-judicial hanging by a group of white men, that you have somehow been singled out for persecution.

I love sports. It is the one place where the law of the jungle truly holds sway. Survival of the fittest is the honor code on the athletic field. In fact, if we will be honest, ALL races believe that Negroes are better athletes. The sheer statistical numbers bear that out.

Coach Daubenmire: Creationist in daily life, but a Darwinist on the playing fields of Eatin’.

Where is white affirmative action in sports? I’d love to be raking in all of that NBA money. But I can’t…not because of my skin color…but because I can’t jump.

..because of your skin color.

Performance is expected on the athletic field, while “special favors” are expected off of it. One makes it in the NFL BECAUSE of his race, while race is somehow a handicap off of the field.

So it all works out even.  Racial discrimination off the field is just nature’s way of making poor black kids financially compensate white people for all the money they’re paying Kobe Bryant, thereby restoring balance to the Force.

Obama’s performance stinks. Who cares what color he is, unless of course, you are an Afro-Chondriac who would argue that his performance is great but our perception of it is influenced because we are racists. Poor guy. It is obvious that black guys can’t make it in America. (You listening LeBron?)

Coach Daubenmire isn’t against Obama because he’s Black.  He’s against him because all the Blacks are for him!  It’s a subtle difference.

Wake up folks. Racism is dead.

Well, it’s dead in the way Jason is always dead in the penultimate scene of a Friday the 13th movie, so it’s sort of an affirmative action death.

Oh, there are little pockets of it here and there, but the greatest wave of racism can be found in the black community.

That’s why it’s best to keep them penned up in ghettos.  It’s not segregation, it’s a quarantine.

Being a racist is socially acceptable in the black community. Can you even imagine the ridicule that would ensue if John McCain had blamed his defeat on his race? “I lost because my white heritage has conditioned me to compromise my beliefs so that others will accept me.”

Well, it would be far from the craziest thing McCain has ever said.  But I give credit to Coach Dave — when he lost a Republican Congressional primary in Ohio, he didn’t even consider putting the blame on his fondness for late 19th century eugenics.

Euro-Chondria is not accepted as a legitimate disorder. Only blacks can blame their difficulties on their skin color.

So all you White screw-ups, also-rans, and ne’er-do-wells: drop your Coppertone and start slathering on the mahogany wood stain!

(Isn’t it refreshing to hear some speak the Truth?)

I haven’t felt this refreshed since the last time I used a Fleet enema.

I love black people…oops…I love people…even black ones.

Well.  That truth-speaking thing didn’t last long, did it?  Back to the drug store…

I have coached some remarkable young black men in my life. Not one of the great one’s ever made an excuse. They accepted the fact that most blacks liked blacks better than whites and that most whites liked whites better than blacks.

Coach Daubenmire leads his team with the same approach he takes to doing the laundry.  Sure, like most men he would prefer to simply throw it all in one load and start the machine, but he takes that extra time to first separate the whites and the colors.

Afro-Chondria is one of the greatest obstacles that black-Americans face. Playing along with their imaginary illness may make one seem more compassionate, but it still leaves the patient feeling sick and dependant.

Those four Sunday School students at the Sixteenth Street Baptist Church in Birmingham would have been fine after the bomb went off if they’d just gotten up and walked it off.

It is time to stop perpetuating the big lie. Blaming the Boogie Man of white racism never forces one to deal with the real problem.

Which is Black racism.  And it’s a serious problem that’s only getting worse, because while White people have most of the guns, one of their guys has access to nuclear weapons.  If we don’t get some Dirk Nowitski posters up in ghetto bedrooms soon, we’re screwed.

Have You Ever Seen a Grown Homophobe Naked?

Posted by scott on September 7th, 2010

Anti-gay and anti-Muslim, the American Family Association’s Bryan Fischer is a bit of a Renaissance bigot, as well as being one of America’s leading Peter Graves impersonators.

“Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?  Well I have, and let me tell you, they’re full of gays.  And Muslims.  And gay Muslims.  In fact, those prisons have gotten so gosh-darned gay and Muslim that I’m gonna have to stop going over to Turkey a couple times a year and breaking the law.  Yep, gonna stop completely — go Cold Turkey, you might say — hehe  – right after the first of the year.  Easter at the latest.  I would’ve stopped already, but I’ve got a non-refundable ticket, and I promised a couple of the younger fellows in Cellblock Ğ that I’d smuggle in some cough syrup.”

Iraqis know our departure means a Muslim bloodbath

Here’s something you wouldn’t expect unless you were an Islamorealist (as opposed to an Islamophobe):

I’m more of an Islamo-neorealist, as you can probably tell from my film, The Burka Thief.

President Obama’s surrender in Iraq is more popular in America than in Iraq.

And by a weird coincidence, the country that approves of the President pulling out of Iraq just happens to be the country he’s President of.  Talk about your dumb luck…

According to the latest CBS poll, about 70% of Americans support the president’s decision to concede and pull our combat troops out of Iraq.

You know who wants our troops to stay? The Iraqis! Nearly 60% of them, according a poll conducted by an Iraqi company, don’t think our troops ought to pull out.

They’re just lazy; if we leave, they’ll have to bomb their own weddings.  On the bright side, this is one of the few times when a man who’s promised to pull out has actually done so.  Might set a precedent.

How can this be? How is it possible that the Muslims in Iraq long for a Christian army to stay in their land?  Simple. They know that Islam is a violent, bloodthirsty religion and that their nation will lapse into uncontrollable chaos once Christian America is no longer projecting force there.

In other words, the Iraqis are Islamorealists. They know instinctively, confirmed by long years of experience, that it is impossible to build or sustain a democratic form of government in an Islamic land.

“Again, look at Turkey!  Yes, yes, I hear they have some kind of parliament, but who cares, when you’re just struggling to survive behind bars — your nude body glazed with perspiration as you perform yoga for hours with your strapping, yet flexible Norwegian cellmate, Karl, then take a long, hot, steamy shower, and finally inject each other in the ass with codeine distilled from a smuggled bottle of Robitussin AC…!

What was I talking about…?”

Islam is about domination, control, and tyranny. While Christianity expands through persuasion, Islam — each variant of it — expands at the point of a sword.

Meso-Americans were just lucky their first contact with the Old World was with Cortés and his Spanish Persuadadors, rather than a bunch of musket-toting Muslims.

There is no such thing as “We the People” in an Islamic country. It is “I the Prophet” everywhere. The Prophet and his Qur’an excercises controlling power, not a democratically elected government or democratically adopted constitution.

But despite the totalitarian power of the Caliphate, I remain hopeful that we may one day reconquer Spain.

Iraqis feel that President Obama has abandoned them to Iran, and indeed he has. It is inevitable that the Persians in Iran will take advantage of the societal meltdown that will follow our departure to establish as much control as possible in the land of their Arab neighbors.

I’m beginning to think Obama’s invasion of Iraq in 2003 played right into the hands of the Achaemenid Empire.

Obama’s falling poll numbers in Muslim lands will rapidly drop into the basement, since most Muslims don’t want an empowered Iran any more than smart thinking Americans do. Ceding Iraq to Iran will not make the president any friends in the rest of the Islamic world.

Well we’re not going to just give them Iraq.  I figure we’ll probably follow the Louisiana Purchase model and sell it to Iran for 3¢ an acre.  We’ve got to do something to recoup that $3 trillion we spent on the war.

Iran’s Ahmadinejad believes that Allah has called him to create worldwide instability in order to prepare the way for the 12th Imam. He’ll start in Iraq, then direct his attention to Israel, then to the U.S.

So get used to the taste of chickpeas, everybody.

Iraq is simply the first domino to fall, and Iraqi Muslims know that if they do not have a Christian army to protect them, they will soon see the disappearance of any semblance of freedom.

Screw Iraq, how about getting a Christian army to protect us?  We got a 12th Imam coming!

Is Islam a religion of violence and war while Christianity is a religion of peace and stability? CBS asked the Iraqis, and they just gave us the answer.

The answer, oddly, was “Reykjavík.”

I Hate You Just The Way You Are

Posted by scott on August 11th, 2010

Doug Giles is not only a Townhall columnist, father of a cosplay hooker and real life famewhore, and painter of Jesus genitals, he’s also the chief pastor of a church which magically appears, like Brigadoon, once a week in the Royal Palms Ballroom of the Aventura Residence Inn, then just as swiftly vanishes and is immediately being replaced by the Association of Industrial Metallizers, Coaters and Laminators (AIMCAL) conference, which is why the congregation had to be out by noon this week, so the hotel staff could set up the buffet table and an overhead projector.

Today’s sermon is entitled, “Pull my finger!”

The Separation Between Muslims and Taste

Building a mosque at Ground Zero is like OJ’s mom putting a glamour shot of Orenthal over Nicole Brown’s gravestone. In other words, it’s very wrong and extremely disgusting, as every person with a lick of decency would agree.

Doug violently objects to Muslims’ taste, to which I can only say, “stop licking them.”

What’s next, Awad?  Are you going to demand a Nidal Malik Hasan Avenue on Ft. Hood’s military base? What about an Abdulmutallab Upgrade Package on Northwest Airlines?

I don’t know, Doug.  Does your church have a Timothy McVeigh Memorial Daycare Center?

To me, the question is not if a mosque could be built right next to the place where Muslims slaughtered 3,000 innocent people, but should it be built.  The “no duh” answer to that insane inquiry is: Hell no, it should not be erected because that is simply gross.

Yep, and I suppose the Israelis should probably tear down the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, since it was built on the bones of Jewish and Muslim men, women, and children who were murdered by Crusaders after the Siege of Jerusalem.  And speaking of “gross,” Doug…please don’t ever say “erected.”

Yet only people who actually give a rat’s backside about what others think could understand or answer such a question … which excludes Muslims.

If only Middle Eastern culture had kept abreast of Western social advancements, they might have developed the concept of “shame.”  Oh sure, we would’ve had to deal with the occasional honor killing, but at least their women wouldn’t always be flaunting their hair.   Anyway, the great thing about Muslims not caring what other people think is, that’s 1.57 billion people who will never ask you if these pants make their ass look big.

In one of the most insensitive acts known to mankind, the “Religion of Peace” blows off courtesy, decorum and the feelings of the vast majority of Americans by establishing a mosque next to the same chunk of soil upon which their Jihadists shed American blood. How quaint. And … how telling.

It’s almost like they don’t even care about our bigots!

The irony in this Islamic insult is the nine years of living hell the daft and duplicitous NYC bureaucrats have been giving St. Nicholas Greek Orthodox Church in getting their church rebuilt after the Twin Towers flattened it on 9/11. But those same NYC bureaucrats are giddy as schoolgirls in erecting a mega-mosque to Mohammed on that macabre scene.

Well, “mega-mosque” isn’t exactly accurate, since “the space would be divided into a prayer space for Muslims and include meeting spaces, meditation rooms, a memorial dedicated to 9/11, a spa, basketball court, swimming pool, auditorium, and classrooms offering everything from digital photography to language classes, all open to the public. The entire facility would also be green and include a garden.”

But there’s an Embassy Suites three blocks away, so why couldn’t they just put all that stuff in the Hudson Ballroom on the Mezzanine Level?  After all — and who would know this better than Pastor Giles? — it works for churches, which are all basically like the Tardis (for much of the medieval era the Cathedral of Notre Dame was just a kiosk, and had to share space with a locksmith and a discount Jester supply shop).

This is sick, twisted, rancid, pathetic, profane and offensive in the extreme.

Yep.  As Giles columns go, this one pretty much covers the checklist.

But this is what they historically do. Muslims see our 3,000 murdered citizens as a conquest to be celebrated, so they’re going to memorialize their bloody victory by establishing a mosque in honor of that sad morning.

You can’t argue with history, and who can forget that when Sultan Mehmed II conquered Constantinople in 1453, his first act was to build a half-court and shoot a game of H.O.R.S.E. using Theophilus Palaeologus’s inflated bladder.

Whiny Islam says we must not draw any offensive cartoons and must remove Jell-O from public schools because of trace pork products; they demand people be fired for bringing BLTs to eat at lunch

Those whiny bitches could certainly take a tip from Doug’s dignified, uncomplaining stoicism.

they want to rename our wars and re-write our history because it wounds their sensitive psyches

Maybe they’re just Texans.

and in return they want to jam a 13-story, 100 million dollar Ground Zero mosque up our tailpipe.

That sound you just heard was Freud’s prosthetic jaw bouncing off the floor.

I’m calling on all contractors far and wide to boycott the building of this insult.

And I’m sure every builder in the Tri-State Area would prefer to sacrifice a multi-million dollar contract rather than take the chance that your Folicure Texturizing Gel will spontaneously combust.

In addition, I’d like Donald Trump to outbid this imam and build a 15-story monument in the shape of a gargantuan middle finger wrapped in the America flag as a symbolic gesture to all our enemies—both foreign and domestic—of what we think about people who mess with America and that for which it stands.

(Photo from George W. Bush’s forthcoming memoir, American Hand Model.)

The Only Problem With White Skin Is, It’s Really Thin!

Posted by scott on July 21st, 2010

When the question is Racism, I like to consult an expert.  So let’s check in with Confederate Yankee.

Like most of you, I’ve followed the Shirley Sherrod saga for the past three days. Unlike many pundits, I’ve been relatively quiet on the matter (except on ).

Where he said things like this:

And retweeted this:

And then got on a roll…

So it’s not that Bob (I Defected to the Losing Side in the Civil War) Owens didn’t have an opinion on Breitbart’s racist smear, he just had one that was best expressed in chunks, much like a frat boy’s lunch immediately after a beer bong.  But now that pants are ablaze all over the right wing media, he’s pulled up his red suspenders and joined the Volunteer Liar Department.

Shirley Sherrod did initially act as a racist. She admits that openly in the short video, and more importantly, the NAACP crowd approves of her sentiments

Bob may not be the most impeccable source, since he’s a racist who publicly fantasizes about having demeaning, probably non-consensual sex with white farmers.  I mean, just take a look at his Twitter feed, in which he very recently wrote the words “racial,” “racism” and “racist,” as well as the phrase, “intent on screwing the white farmer.”  Now I haven’t bothered to read the rest of the sentences to see what the context of those words were, so I suppose it’s possible I’ve misinterpreted him, and in the farmer fantasy he actually wants to be the bottom.

But here are the facts.

Breitbart may have over-reached and be unrepentant, but his sin was still relatively minor.

Defamation is as trivial a sin as masturbation, which should be obvious, because they rhyme.

He presented as much of the story as he had, and explained it the best he could based upon the information provided. Was it responsible to run that short video segment without context?

As you consider your response, think about how much news is run without the entire story being known at the outset.

Right.  Of course, when there’s a terrorist attack, or a natural disaster, or some nut goes on a shooting spree, it’s understandable that reporters who are on the spot won’t immediately have all the facts, and the story will gradually be refined as more information becomes available.  On the other hand, when you’re posting a deceptively edited fragment of a speech that was given back in March, which references events that occurred 24 years ago, it doesn’t seem like you’re in all that much danger of being scooped.

It was the NAACP and USDA, acting under orders from Frum’s idle idol in the White House, that over-reacted and pilloried Shirley Sherrod. They demanded her roadside resignation without giving her any chance to defend herself at all.

It is indeed shameful that members of the Obama Administration would think for a moment that anything that came out of Andrew Breitbart’s mouth was true, with the possible except of a post-prandial belch.

Now that the full video is up for everyone to watch, we can easily understand why Shirley Sherrod harbors some racism in her heart.

Which seems like putting all your eggs in one basket.  Bob, on the other hand, has allowed racism to metastasize to his every major organ just to be safe.   You never know when there might be a peckerwood famine.

Meanwhile, Jim Treacher has re-posted Breitbart’s video, which is not only deceptively edited, but opens with a series of blatantly false statements, including “Miss Sherrod admits that in her federally appointed position” — she was working for a non-profit organization at the time — “overseeing a billion dollars…” — not even close to true, but one imagines Breitbart saying it while touching a pinkie to the corner of his pursed lips, à la Dr. Evil — “She discriminates against people due to their race.”  Note the present tense.

In his professional capacity, Jim is generally a man of few words, for which we thank him, and he doesn’t add much to the defamatory video, except an oddly sullen little harrumph about the cruel double standard which prevents white people from talking about how they overcame their own resentments and preconceptions:

As you look in vain for this in the newspapers and on the nightly news, imagine if Shirley Sherrod was a white person in a position of power and was talking about a poor black person. You wouldn’t be able to walk around in any newsroom in the country, what with all the drool on the floor.

As it turns out, this story has gotten quite a bit more attention than Jim predicted, which you’d think would make him happy, but his subsequent updates just seem increasingly confused.

P.S. Ed Morrissey: “The NAACP is about to learn one of the most basic of all lessons in life — those who live in glass houses should avoid provoking a stone-throwing war.”

Well Ed was half right.  Jim’s next update links to a Stephen Spruiell piece on The Corner:

P.P.S. Taken out of context?

Spruiell writes:  “The NAACP has posted the full video of the Shirley Sherrod speech. After watching it, it is impossible not to conclude that the Obama administration made the wrong decision in forcing her resignation.”  So to answer Jim’s plaintive query:  Yes.

After noting that even though NAACP President Ben Jealous was present at the speech, he still doesn’t think Ms. Sherrod is a racist just because he listened to the whole thing, Jim drops the narrative thread, but once again demonstrates his consummate self-Googling skills by tweezing out a passing mention of him in an Ezra Klein piece about an entirely different imaginary scandal:

P.P.P.P.S. JournoList founder and WaPo blogger Ezra Klein seems to have a problem with this post (in the middle of a 1,500-word response to the Daily Caller that could be charitably described as meandering), but I can’t help but notice that he doesn’t even try to deny my point about liberal media bias. That cat is well and truly out of the bag

Today Jim struck a blow for Truth and Adolescent Resentment by posting the complete video of Ms. Sherrod’s speech, and sulking:

If it matters, I never said the Obama administration should fire her, and I never said the NAACP should condemn her. I just posted the original video and said that it would be a very different story if Sherrod was white and was talking about a black person. Whether you agree with that or not, that was the extent of my opinion on the matter.

You would expect that, after acting as an accessory to libel, Jim might want do more than cross his arms with an exaggerated sigh and roll his eyes.  Maybe apologize to the victim, and reach for a bit of that redemption she was talking about.  Maybe apologize to his readers for uncritically passing on lies, or at least provide some of that “context” that so evidently baffled him yesterday.  So let’s check his blog and see how he’s attempting to make things right:

It’s a bumpy road to Damascus.

Brother Against Brother (Except One of the Brothers is a Brother!)

Posted by scott on July 20th, 2010

Pam Geller is back with a think piece at American Thinker that will make you think about America.

A War amongst Ourselves

It is becoming increasingly clear to anyone paying attention that the seeds of division are being sown with increased vigor by Obama’s shadowy machine.

Okay, Pam, I can see that you’re upset, or aroused, and I understand, I do, but — come on — “seeds” are being sown with “increased vigor” by “Obama’s shadowy machine?”  His shadowy machine?

Really, Pam?

I mean, no offense, but I haven’t read so many lurid euphemisms for interracial sex in a single sentence since Kyle Onstott was alive.*

America, in her naïveté and eternal hopefulness, thought that electing Barack Hussein Obama would be the final chapter on race in America

America is sweet and innocent, but kind of a ninny.

…and would hammer the last nail into a well-deserved coffin

I get the hammering the nail thing — subtle — but calling her womanly cleft a “coffin” seems overly gothic.

…for the divisive racial narratives that demagogues and provocateurs have used for so long to tear down this country.

Pam apparently means “demagogues and provocateurs” like the NAACP, who have been spreading “divisive racial narratives” like “slavery was bad” and “people should be able to vote without getting lynched” throughout our national coffin for over a century.

Little did America know that Barack Obama was the candidate of exactly those demagogues and provocateurs.

We had no idea how many Obama supporters were black!  But by the time we found out, it was too late to cancel the Inaugural Ball, since we’d already put a deposit down on the VFW hall and hired Chad Przybylski & The Polka Rhythms.

In a stunning reversal of decades of progress and harmony, during which spokesmen from the hate fringe like Louis Farrakhan were cast outside the realm of decent society, Obama’s presidency has ushered in the era of the hater. In the new doublespeak, hate is good.

Oddly, I remember seeing Farrakhan on the news a lot more when the last few white guys were in the Oval Office.  Maybe I should get my TV checked.

And every single good, decent American who is standing up for individual freedoms, small government, and self-reliance is now evil.

Oh, I wouldn’t say that, Pam…

Sowing the seeds of division is a pillar of Obama’s short but destructive presidency.

Again — who sows seeds with a pillar?  Listen, Pam, do  you want to take a little “me time” and get back to us when the flush goes away?

It started early. The Boston incident involving Henry Louis Gates gave a clear indication of how he would inflame the populace with racist rhetoric.

Who can forget how Washington burned after Obama got everybody together for a beer in the Rose Garden?

That incident was not a blip, but an opening salvo.

…Obama and company’s opening salvo. That was a red flag for America.

It was an opening salvo and a red flag by a seed-sowing, shadowy machine with a big pillar.  And it’s a dessert topping!

Why? What was the objective in creating such divisive hate propaganda? Sowing the seeds of war.

The racist war machine went into high gear again when the NAACP adopted a libelous resolution condemning “racist elements” in the Tea Party movement. They called on the movement’s leaders to repudiate bigotry, despite cries from Tea Party members across the country that the “resolution” was just a “political ploy.” It was worse than that. It was a declaration of war against good, decent people. A missile at the heart of American unity, subversion to melt the melting pot.

Ah, so the shadowy machine is also a racist machine, and the seeds it sows are war seeds.  And Obama, unlike a white president, who would probably use a crucible or some form of smelting equipment to melt the melting pot, uses a missile! Because — have you seen the size of that guy’s feet?

Predator Louis Farrakhan joined in this malevolent campaign when he sent a three-page letter along with two books to the heads of sixteen Jewish organizations. In it, he charges Jews with being “anti-Black” and demands reparations — in the spirit of making amends for the injustices Jews have supposedly done to blacks.

Farrakhan’s idea of amends is another six million Jews to the pyre.

Presumably Farrakhan believes that if he sends enough correspondence and books to the Jews, they’ll pile up and create a fire hazard, and eventually somebody will knock over a space heater…

These are the leading insurgents in the war against America.

Well, given that Farrakhan is a discredited nut with no entrée to, or influence over, the White House, it looks like America’s gonna kick ass in this war.  Which will certainly be a nice change.

The objective is to pit American against American. The post-American president is sowing the seeds of hate and racism, creating divides that never existed before his presidency.

It’s like the Civil War, but with sizzling black-on-white action so hot it’ll melt your melting pot.

*I don’t actually know if Kyle Onstott is dead.

Kathleen Parker: I Don’t See Race. Just Sissies

Posted by scott on July 3rd, 2010

Conservative Washington Post columnist (but I repeat myself) Kathleen Parker probably expected to get a little heat for her piece declaring that Obama is our first “Female President” (because he relies on femmy, testicular-free traits like talking, and listening); however, the bulk of the complaints are not coming from shrill and effeminate liberals, but from an entirely unanticipated quarter:

In the days since I suggested that President Obama’s rhetorical style mimics feminine tropes, I’ve been informed of the following:

One, a black man cannot show anger in public lest he be considered an Angry Black Man.

Two, to suggest that a black man has any feminine characteristics, even when framed as an “evolutionary achievement,” is to emasculate and reduce him to a figure from Jim Crow days.

Some of those who wrote were polite, self-identifying African Americans.

I applaud Kathleen for considering this criticism with an open mind, although it does make her seem kind of girly.  But from this humbling give and take, she has gleaned two eye-opening lessons:  “people are too sensitive” and — more importantly –

[M]y life experience is different from that of most African Americans. And that experience allows me both the luxury of seeing people without the lens of race, but also (sometimes) to fail to imagine how people of other backgrounds might interpret my words.

It’s rare for an opinion merchant from the major media to confess an error, so it’s all the more refreshing to see Kathleen admit that she sometimes forgets how Black people can have a hard time seeing her point through their melanin cataracts.

Toxic Vox Syndrome

Posted by scott on May 11th, 2010


When we last saw “Christian libertarian,” SF/fantasy writer, video game designer, recording artist, “internet superintelligence,” and innovative rape theorist Vox Day, he was telling quake-ravaged Haiti to suck it. Today, he’s pulling one of those triple axel paradoxes so beloved by wingnut provocateurs, explaining that Mexicans will never dissolve in our melting pot, even if we use a double boiler.

The revoluciónary is right

Americans did not worry about the massive migration of Mexicans and other third-world immigrants for many years due to their belief in equality and the idea of the American melting pot. Unfortunately, both concepts are complete myths, devoid of any support from logic, history or science.

Said the author of Summa Elvetica: A Casuistry of the Elvish Controversy.

Despite the best efforts of the academic thought police and pop literary fantasists…various scientific disciplines have quietly, but inexorably been demolishing the equalitarian hypothesis with regard to race, culture and sex.

But the big question remains, “Do Elves Have Souls?”

There is, quite simply, no such thing as human equality in any material sense. In fact, the latest genetic research on potential Neanderthal genes found in humans of non-African descent suggest that it is not entirely accurate to even assert that homo sapiens is not divided into various subspecies.

Using mitchondrial DNA, Vox has traced his lineage to the human sub-species Homo douche.

As for the myth of the American melting pot, it should suffice to point out that the idea was popularized by a Russian Jew who emigrated to England, never lived in the United States and was a fervent believer in the cause of establishing a Jewish homeland.

That would be Israel Zangwill, who was actually born in London.

Basing immigration policy on the idea of the melting pot is about as rational as setting foreign policy on the basis of the example set by the United Federation of Planets in Star Trek.

Any serious statesman would base his diplomatic and geo-stategic policy initiatives on Babylon 5

It is not only fiction, but ignorant foreign fiction at that.

Turns out you can’t melt literature, either, even English literature — the pages just stick together. Especially Fanny Hill.

The reality is that from the mid-17th century to the mid-19th century, the New England states had almost no immigration for 200 years.

Mr. Day? There’s a Mohican here who’d like to see you. No, just the one…

The reality is that America will proceed on one of two paths. The first is to embrace the conflict. If Americans can find the courage to consciously reject the myth of the melting pot and expel the Mexicans from the American Southwest, the Arabs from Detroit and the Somalis from Minneapolis, they can reclaim their traditional white Anglo-Saxon Protestant culture.

…although dinner’s gonna be a little on the bland side from now on. Speaking of genocide, long time readers will recall that Vox has played the relocation card in the past, writing:


Not only will it work, but one can easily estimate how long it would take. If it took the Germans less than four years to rid themselves of 6 million Jews, many of whom spoke German and were fully integrated into German society, it couldn’t possibly take more than eight years to deport 12 million illegal aliens, many of whom don’t speak English and are not integrated into American society.

And the Nazis didn’t even have benefit of the Flaming Langschwert of Wahrheit!

This is highly improbable because so many descendants of that culture have rejected it in favor of the vibrancy of diversity while those who haven’t are far too frightened of criticism and social rejection to even articulate their thoughts.

This is probably a good time to mention that Vox has a new T-shirt in his CafePress store: “I Failed to Ethnically Cleanse America and All I Got Was This Lousy Vibrant Diversity.”

Peter Frampton is Pissed

Posted by scott on March 17th, 2010


Jen Shroder has been wingnutting for quite awhile now, under a variety of names (although they all seem to be variations of “Shroeder”), but always with that same old headshot from her days with Humble Pie. Sheri wrote about her a number of times on the old site here and and here for instance, but she seems to have dropped off the WO’C radar after 2004. Which is kind of a shame, because even though nowadays you can get the same frothing dementia from the national brand of wingnut, you can still find some real bargains if you drive down to that Wonder Bread outlet where they sell the day old stuff. And this week she’s serving up a huge remaindered helping of “Obama is date raping America,” which — granted — was kind of stale when WorldNetDaily’s David Kupelian offered it two weeks ago; but still, Jen brings her own uniquely ergotismic fungus to the culture.

Obama like a bad date

So President Obama has extended the health bill deadline yet AGAIN. What part of “no” does he not understand? We keep rejecting him but he ignores our protests. His nudges have progressed into shoves as America is crowded like a cheap date into the backseat of his Pontiac.

So he puts America in the back seat, and then presumably chauffeurs it around for awhile before stopping in some secluded spot and getting all handsy? I guess, in Jen’s view, health care reform is basically the porn version of Driving Miss Daisy.

Like a cad who refuses to take “no” for an answer, Obama assures us over and over that he has the answer to all of our questions but doesn’t want to tell us what it is until after he’s had his way. Most men this persistent get their faces slapped, but I doubt the Secret Service would understand.

So it’s not a date, now it’s a Q&A? I guess that means we’re not in an interracial roughie anymore, but one of those Japanese schoolgirl porns, where some AV Idol in a sailor suit is using her digitally blurred vagina to wheedle the mid-term answers out of her teacher.

America has said NO and we mean it, we keep trying to walk away, but Obama is twisting the arms of his Congressional gang to help shove. How did America end up as a cheap date waking up prematurely from a roofie?

I apologize for my faulty memory, but…was George W. Bush routinely accused of rape? I mean Bush, personally, not his duly authorized representatives in the CIA who threatened to rape the children of Afghan and Iraqi detainees in front of them. Because that could have been just a lot of big talk, and anyway, it’s like blaming the Denny’s night manager when the bacon in your Grand Slamwich® isn’t crisp and the waitress only brings you one refill.

After all, Obama was recommended to us by…um, well, Bill Ayers? Reverend Wright? (wince)

Sadly, it would seem the American people considered those recommendations more reliable than the endorsements of Dick Cheney (sneer), Mike Huckabee (grimace), Fred Thompson (O-face), Mitt Romney (hand jive), or Joe Lieberman (Spock eyebrow).

But Obama has a great reputation of…uh oh, what has he EVER done before?

Well, he won a Presidential election. That usually spices up a resume.

We bounded down the stairs and out the door with this man because, well, he’s such a smooth talker…whoops.

What happened — did you slip? How many times have I told you not to bound down the stairs! And use the handrail!

And now he’s insisting on something we had no intention of participating in while whispering in our ear that his provisions “can never be amended.” (gasp) As in “forever” Barry? Do you mean to marry me?

Oh. So it’s not porn. Jen’s just been reading those slightly more explicit Harlequin “Blaze” books.

What’s that? You’d rather be a one term President that’s had his way with me than go the duration as long as you “fundamentally transform” me?


Well now she’s just being a tease.

Somehow I have the feeling that my “fundamental transformation” has nothing to do with a ring and a future, instead I’ll be left with a socialist disease.

Well, if your religious scruples didn’t prevent you from using condoms, you might have got away with nothing worse than a mild pinko inflammation. But the point is, Obama is already married, so that’s bigamy! And it’s me, too. Yes, it’s big of all of us. Let’s be big for a change!

The answer is NO, Mr. President. NO! We do NOT want to get in this vehicle, get your hands off our credit card and get Harry Reid out of our way! We don’t care WHAT Nancy says, we don’t need to get in the backseat with you to see what you’re selling. So TAKE US HOME, Mr. President, TAKE US HOME.

It’s a car, honey, not a time machine.

We survived the War of 1812, the Mexican-American War, the Civil War, the Spanish-American War, World War I, World War II, the Korean War, the Vietnam War, Desert Storm and when the smoke cleared our nation stood strong holding the banner, our American flag for freedom! We counted our losses, we mourned our sons and daughters, but our nation and our nation alone withstood all battles for FREEDOM. Only to be pushed into the back seat of Obama’s car through a maligned “reconciliation” with Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid pushing right along with him.

It’s amazing that we survived all those wars, only to be undone by one dusky lothario in the back seat of a Pontiac. If only Tojo had thought to recruit an army of Negroes in zoot suits, we’d all be eating sushi now.

They are stopping at nothing, even using little boys with trumped up stories that make no sense.

“So let me get this straight, kid…Your mother died because she couldn’t afford medical care, and now you go to Washington to plead with Congress to pass health insurance reform? You don’t get it, kid! You’re a little boy. Your mother dies. That doesn’t make you a health care reform advocate, that makes you the lead character in a Disney animated feature!”

Would you like to hear my sob story of a chronically cheating husband that asked me not to divorce him because he was dying of liver damage (alcoholism) and was afraid to be cut off from my medical insurance?

Um, no offense, but I’m just an obscure blogger. You probably want to pitch that to the Lifetime Channel.

I waited for two years before he told me California would cover his medical expenses and has been ever since the divorce became final. How is it that a single unemployed mom can’t qualify but my ex-husband can?

I agree, that would seem to suggest a deeply flawed, uneven, and unfair system in desperate need of reform.

In fact, states close to the border are going broke but they manage to pay medical expenses for illegal aliens.

Admittedly, California is going broke, but it has less to do with illegal aliens (many of whom are abandoning the state) and more to do with recalcitrant Republicans and the suicidal fact that our constitution requires a supermajority in order to raise taxes. In fact, as Doghouse Riley mentioned over at his place yesterday, Indiana is also going broke, but that seems to be more a result of “Surly Megalomaniacs With Napoleonic Complexes,” than waves of Salvadorans pouring over the border from Michigan.

There is something seriously flawed with the sob stories claimed by progressives.

So Macelas Owens’ mother must be still alive! Q.E.D.

Our country has stood for so much, we are the most charitable nation on the planet, we have defended freedom, we have survived so much, I shudder to think we might not survive President Obama and his co-conspirators in Congress making up sob stories.

If there’s one thing low rent pundits can’t abide, it’s anecdotes.

We will remember who votes for this bill. We will remember who shoved this bill down our throats. If Obama succeeds, we will remember who helped push us into the backseat of his car, and those names will go down in history, way, way down.

I hate to blame the victim, but now it sounds like you’re just asking for it.

WND: Obama Is Emmett Till Proven Innocent

Posted by scott on March 5th, 2010

We all have our quirky little enthusiasms. Interests and attachments that are difficult to defend — even objectively silly — but nonetheless fun and fulfilling. I happen to have a passion for egregiously bad movies. Mary is partial to the TV series Castle. Riley enjoys a fine catnip and a persistent patch of sunlight. And managing editor of World Net Daily David Kupelian really, really likes rape.


And you can see why. For a man whose sexual confidence seems to constantly tremble like a Jenga tower in the later stages of play, rape is a wonderfully convenient, labor-saving device, the Swiss Army knife of metaphors. In 2005, when a movie sympathetic to the plight of gay men in America was released to favorable reviews, and David was reduced to a lonely voice, howling in the wilderness, rape was there for him:

“Brokeback Mountain,” the controversial “gay cowboy” film that has garnered seven Golden Globe nominations and breathless media reviews – and has now emerged as a front-runner for the Oscars – is a brilliant propaganda film, reportedly causing viewers to change the way they feel about homosexual relationships and same-sex marriage.

And how do the movie-makers pull off such a dazzling feat? Simple. They do it by raping the “Marlboro Man,” that revered American symbol of rugged individualism and masculinity.

What could be worse than Hollywood sodomizing our beloved corporate mascots? Only the prospect of the White House — the home of America’s Caesars! — occupied by a Nubian upstart whose idea of bipartisanship is to ask, “Where the white women at?”

Barack Obama and the date-rape of America

Good Americans from sea to shining sea are grappling right now with how to mentally process what they’re witnessing in Washington, D.C.

The spectacle of a far leftist president literally forcing socialized medicine down the throat of an unwilling center-right America is reminiscent, perhaps more than any other contemporary metaphor, of date rape.

America is like South Carolina in the second half of Birth of a Nation — ravished by triumphant Negroes — but even worse, because at least those guys were actually white under all that burnt cork.

A man determined to have his way with a woman may start off seducing her with lies, flattery and the usual pretense of caring about her. But at a critical moment, when she says, “Stop, I’m not comfortable with this and don’t want to go any further,” he has a choice: Either do the right thing and back off, or abandon all prior pretensions and take her by force.

I’m not surprised to see that David, as a traditionalist, has followed the time-honored literary dictum, write what you know.

As president, Barack Obama courted us with sweet talk, but America grew increasingly uncomfortable with his advances and firmly said, “Stop” – in fact, screamed bloody murder for months. Yet Obama remains obsessed with forcing himself on America.

In addition to serving as editor of WND and Whistleblower, David has authored several books of best-selling moral wisdom, including How Evil Works: Understanding and Overcoming the Destructive Forces That Are Transforming America, The Marketing of Evil: How Radicals, Elitists, and Pseudo-Experts Sell Us Corruption Disguised As Freedom, and The Huge Black Penis of Evil: How Evil Has a Huge Black Penis.

Put aside for the moment the fact that Obama is single-handedly destroying the Democratic Party for years, perhaps decades, by maniacally pursuing Obamacare as though it were Moby Dick and he Captain Ahab, leading all the Pequod’s hapless Democrat crewmen into political destruction.

Most experts agree that in the wild, the Huge Black Penis has only one natural enemy: Moby Dick.

America is not, after all, a place like Cuba or Zimbabwe where corrupt dictators get their way through sheer ruthlessness, intimidation and naked arrogance. We’re accustomed to the rule of law, to civility, to due process, even in the most difficult and contentious of times. After all, when Hillarycare was soundly rejected by Americans during Bill Clinton’s first term, he wisely backed off and stopped trying to force socialized medicine on us. (And Bill was a guy with his own date-rape problems, but that’s another story.)

And he was a white man, and stuck to his own kind, and we don’t really care what the poor white trash get up to with themselves, so long as they don’t frighten horses or show up drunk to church.

A few weeks ago I interviewed a top forensic psychiatrist – a medical professional who makes his living evaluating and providing expert testimony regarding the mental condition of people in court cases…I asked him, “Does Barack Obama have Narcissistic Personality Disorder?” Mind you, this was not about whether the president is “narcissistic,” which everyone already knows. Rather, Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a serious mental illness or personality disorder with a broad and disturbing symptom picture.

The forensic psychiatrist’s response to my question: “Yes, that’s a fair assessment, maybe even Malignant Narcissistic Personality Disorder” (which crosses over into criminality).

It’s like that Dick Van Dyke geriatric mystery series, combined with a pervy Dick Wolf procedureal. Diagnosis: Rape.

We went through a few of the major symptoms, including: 1) a grandiose view of one’s achievements (everything with Obama is “historic”)

Obama thinks he’s something special, but lots of black men have gotten themselves elected President of the United States. Morgan Freeman does it like three times a year.

2) utter inability to handle criticism (everyone criticizing him or his policies is attacked as a radical or extremist, even Fox News was attacked)

Roosevelt was the same way in 1941 (everyone who bombed us was attacked as treacherous and dastardly, even Tokyo was attacked). If FDR had had a lick of self-reflection, he would have taken Pearl Harbor as constructive criticism of our scrap metal embargo.

and 3) lack of genuine empathy (in his televised speech immediately after the Fort Hood shooting – while the entire nation was reeling in shock – he engaged in small talk and “shout-outs” for two full minutes before mentioning the worst terror attack on our soil since 9/11.)

I prefer paralysis or panic in my presidents, and Bush managed both in one day. That’s versatility.

Imagine you just met someone who was unusually arrogant, greedy and selfish, who considered himself far superior to everyone else, above the need to be truthful, above the law (and willing to break any law he could get away with), who was contemptuous of others and utterly impervious to criticism or self-reflection – and who also harbored an overwhelming urge not only to take your money, but to control you, to exert power over your life! You might understandably conclude that person is mentally deranged or even a criminal.

Or you might just wonder why your hostess seated you next to Glenn Beck.

how can he justify using such dishonest means to force his will on an unwilling American public? In other words, how can he countenance, in effect, date-raping America?

I don’t know, Dave, but maybe you should be a little more concerned about what you’re going to tell the police, since DNA testing has found traces of your semen in the rectum of the English language.

What we need to understand is that, between his hate-based ideology (Winston Churchill called socialism the “gospel of envy”), extreme narcissism and long-internalized political corruption, Obama and others like him, literally drunk on power, live essentially in a state of delusion: Down is up, truth is cruel and impractical, corruption is just “conducting business,” morality is repression, lying is a creative force.

You know what, I’m flat out of projection, and homeless-guy-arguing-with-his-reflection-in-a-plate-glass-window jokes. You guys got anything?

Those on the far left regions where Obama, Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid dwell regard free-market capitalism as irredeemably evil, exploitive and unjust – and therefore in need of destruction to make way for the creation of something more noble and just. Likewise, they look at influential conservatives not simply as “old-fashioned,” “selfish” or “religious nuts,” but as evil. (Remember, Dick Cheney was “Darth Vader” and Karl Rove “the emperor.”) If you think I exaggerate the monumental, self-righteous rage with which the left abhors conservatives, watch MSLSD for 15 minutes. I rest my case.

The jury will now retire to consider their verdict and beat the prosecutor senseless with a bar of Lifebuoy stuffed in a tubesock.

Thus, the left thinks of their constant lying and deceiving the way you and I might regard lying and deceiving were we German undercover operatives in the Nazi army plotting to kill Hitler, as in the true-life Operation Valkyrie. Col. von Stauffenberg and the other courageous patriots in the German army were lying and deceiving all day long. After all, war is deception, and they were operating behind enemy lines, trying to slay a monster and end a terrible war. Their deceptions were indeed noble.

Shorter David Kupelian: “Yes, but we’re like the good Nazis!”

That’s how Obama and company think of their daily depredations that endanger the very existence of America as a land of liberty and light among the nations.

President, Don’t Let the Sun Set on You in America.

Any way you slice it – psychologically, ideologically, politically, morally – we are talking about people in the grip of dark forces and delusion, hell-bent on leading the rest of us downward, which they see as upward. The fact that they may not be fully conscious of the evil they do may make it easier for us not to hate them.

Yeah, um…the feeling’s not mutual.

But hate is not what we need, anyway. What we need is to vote every single one of Obama’s congressional collaborators out of office this November, and to do it so decisively that even “the anointed one’s” gigantic fortress-life shell of denial is shattered into a million pieces – as the bells of freedom ring once again throughout America.


“Jeb, you set up the card table over there with the voter guides and the ‘I Voted!’ stickers. Wade, you hand out the leaflets, but be careful not to electioneer within a hundred feet of the polling place.”