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Update: Okay, it turns out that today, December 21 is actually DH’s birthday.  My apologies for the screw-up, and hey, let’s keep the party going!

Today is the natal anniversary of the Hoosier Sage, who for my money is in a dead heat with Roy Edroso for Web’s Best Wordsmith (making them a kind of Alias Worthsmith and Jones).  Mr. Riley has been kind enough to favor World O’ Crap with his comments going back to the old Salon blog days, and has demonstrated, besides his obvious literary gifts, a flair for gastronomy, oenophilia, and history.  He also, as s.z. once remarked, seems to know a lot about heroin.

Before we go any further, I must discharge an unpleasant duty:

Ann Coulter prepares to launch herself across the table toward a fan whom she suspects of possessing the One Ring.

In addition to Mr. Riley, other literary luminaries who burst from the forehead of Zeus on this date include:

Hortense Calisher, novelist.

Dick Wolf, creator of some sort of self-replicating virus that infects cable television.

Jean Racine, who I didn’t bother to research, but I assume is from Wisconsin, and probably wrote the tragedy, Les Fromagers.

Andrei Codrescu, Romanian-born U.S. poet and professor whose literary journal, Exquisite Corpse, published the first excerpts from Better Living Through Bad Movies.  (It’s true.  You could look it up.)

Tom Gries, who fans of Mystery Science Theater 3000 (such as Mr. Riley) will remember as the screenwriter of the Season 2 classic King Dinosaur.

Now, before I go, I should probably administer the antidote:

Happy birthday, Doghouse!  Thanks for classing the joint up these many years; and here’s to many more.

18 Responses to “Happy Birthday, Doghouse Riley!”

Looks too cold for those daisies to thrive.

Happy B-day, Doghouse!

Hortense Calisher, novelist… and inspiration for Jimmy Durante’s sign-off, “Goodnight, Mrs. Calisher, wherever you are!”

(I believe from internal evidence that Doghouse is old enough to get this allusion.)

Well, hell, Mr. Riley, happy dog day(s)!

p.s. Those daises were wilted before she came into the picture!

Happy Birthday, Mr. House Riley.
From that photo of La Coulter, I’d say she knows even more about herion.

D.R., if I’d known today was your natal anniversary I would have mentioned on today’s birthday list along with Audrey Totter, Charley Grapewin, Irene Dunne, Albert Dekker, Dennis Morgan, George Roy Hill, Charlie Callas, Mala Powers, John Hillerman, John Spencer, Alan Parsons, Claudia Jennings, Jenny Agutter, Michael Badalucco and Billy Bragg, to name but a few. Happy birthday to you, good sir!

Happy birthday, Doghouse! As your official stalker, I take my duties seriously. This year to celebrate, I have trained the finches in your neighborhood to chirp a coded version of your horoscope. Also, I replaced all the gravel in the front yard of a house three towns away from you with exactly identical gravel! (I knew this was what you wanted from the secret messages you send via your punctuation.)

Really, happy birthday and many more. In a world of McArdles and Goldbergs and Krauthammers, we need you out there striking a blow for the sophisticated grumping that tempers sharp insight with true humanity. It’s like having our own Thurber, and we are grateful.

D. Sidhe: that was so funny i wish i’d said it.

who for my money is in a dead heat with Roy Edroso for Web’s Best Wordsmith

It’s a close call, ain’t it? My two favorite things about Roy’s site: Roy’s posts and the comments section.

you will, Bill S., you will -to paraphrase James McNeill Whistler

and Happy Birthday Mr Doghouse

I must discharge an unpleasant duty

and Scott,I think you should see a good physician about that

Y’all are wonderful, and too kind. Really. ‘Cause it’s tomorrow.

Solstice baby. I hung on for six days just to let my pagan flag fly (and share the day with Frank Zappa, Peetie Wheatstraw, Rebecca West, and Andy Dick. Serves me right.)

But thanks, again. It was just what I wanted.

Wellll…crap. (Adjusting calendar)…I’ll get it right next year!

I just want to say, Actor and heydave, you are obviously super distracted, because those are not daisies, those are daffodils.

Eh, who can blame you? That orange shirt stole my focus, too.

Honestly. Who wears an orange shirt to a photo shoot?! I ask you!

yeah, I bet the photographer asked her to take it off so it wouldn’t distract for the next shot

Well, Happy birthday D.R.! and of course many happy returns.

I just want to say, Actor and heydave, you are obviously super distracted, because those are not daisies, those are daffodils.

It would have been narcissistic of me to admit I knew that.

Besides, daisies works better in the joke.

Actually, I was too busy fashioning a Lil’ Mitch Daniels (pardon the redundancy) voodoo doll for DogHouse to notice the flowers closely.

Wow, Ann Coulter on a rare little-black-dress-free day.

Happy Birthday Riley, and Carmen Sternwood says– well you know the rest (god I never get tired of that gag).

Oh, she’s scary.

Doghouse, on the other hand, is Doghouse. Happy birthday, son.

Something to say?