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« Dumb and Dumber
Post-Friday Beast Blogging: The “See If You Can Spot The Evil” Edition »

Obama Uses School Kids As Batteries To Power The Matrix!

I learn so much from World Net Daily.  For instance, did you know that in addition to being a usurper, a fascist dictator, a crypto-communist, and a crack-smoking closet homosexual, President Obama is also a public utility?  And that every time you turn on a light, or make a waffle, you buy our foreign-born fuhrer another czar?  Check it out:

PresidentConEd.jpg

Part of me feels sorry for the WND readers who buy the homemade generator diagram, and the secret martial arts brochure, and the “breakthrough of the century” — discovered by “Navy sailors” — for avoiding “heart and brain disasters.”  But another part of me kind of enjoys the thought of them going off the grid with a jaunty, “so long, suckers!” only to find themselves shouting at Grandma to “pedal faster” so they can crank up enough juice to get on Mapquest and download directions to the next Tea Party.

Posted by scott on Wednesday, October 7th, 2009 at 12:05 am.

17 Responses to “Obama Uses School Kids As Batteries To Power The Matrix!”

I’m glad those people may have found the marketing appeal that will work for them.

Those ads (w/o the Prez mentioned) have been all over cyberville. Wonder if the ones on rational sites will use Obama as the demon.

Left by M. Bouffant on October 7th, 2009

Those make-your-own-electricity ads have shown up on Eschaton, too…
Actually, you can get plans for that stuff off the intertubes, if hou have teh google, and for a lot less than a hundred bucks. Or even free. Then again you have to actually build the damn thing, which is a whole nother matter. Then you have to build a tower. Then you have to pay an electrician to wire it up. Then you have to try to talk your power co into a co-gen setup, which they won’t all do, and by this time that pile of used scrap iron you scrounged is rusted away to a brown stain on the patio, and the kids that were gonna help have finished high school, got married, and left town…

Left by Meanie-meanie, tickle a person on October 7th, 2009

I hope the solar panels and wind generators do work. Oops, I mean, don’t do that wingnuts! As an Obot I hate alternative energy!

Left by Hysterical Woman on October 7th, 2009

Scott, you’re missing an obvious plot by the Obamans to force conservatives to accept alternative energy and carbon-free electricity!

OMG! This is TERRIBLE! The Muslin conspiracy to take over our country is indeed deeply embedded in the psyche, so much so that we’re taking over the right wing too!

I mean, they’re taking over the right wing! Shania law, bitches!!

Left by actor212 on October 7th, 2009

For real?

Left by mary b on October 7th, 2009

Yeah, but until Wing Nut Doozy sells the plans for the force field generator, our brave individualist heroes cannot truly “go Galt”.

(Gah, my sense of professional ethics now keeps the junior engineer in me from offering “do it yourself deflectors” via ads on WMD…)

Left by tensor on October 7th, 2009

I need a scrub brush and a long hot shower.

Left by gc_wall on October 8th, 2009

Wait till they hear about that kid from Malawi (who was on the Daily Show last night) who built a wind powered electric generator from trash lying around his village. Also, he built a circuit breaker with nails and a magnet. Africa, baby!

Left by Dr. BDH on October 8th, 2009

I totally have saved tons on my power bills since I started using schoolchildren as batteries.

Left by 77south on October 8th, 2009

The trouble with using school children as batteries is they wear out after a couple years, and NAPA won’t exchange them for new ones. Even if you pay full price, they don’t take the old weezened dried up ones off your hands. Most people leave them in alleys.

Left by Capmconnundrum on October 8th, 2009

The trouble with using school children as batteries is they wear out after a couple years, and NAPA won’t exchange them for new ones.

This is why I’ve proposed marriage to Kate Gossellin

Left by actor212 on October 9th, 2009

Yeah, well I stuck it to the man, G. W. Bush, by not using toilet paper when he was in office!

I used remaindered copies of Bill Frist’s book.

Mmm, and with Going Rouge soon available, I can continue my Galtish ways.

Left by heydave on October 9th, 2009

Yeah, well I stuck it to the man, G. W. Bush, by not using toilet paper when he was in office!

So Bush was a secret wood-pulp magnate after all (“Need some wood?” – 2nd 2004 Pres. debate)! Nice going, heydave.

Left by Li'l Innocent on October 9th, 2009

This is why I’ve proposed marriage to Kate Gossellin

“actor212 & Kate Plus 8 D-Cells” does have a certain ring to it.

Left by Realist on October 10th, 2009

Mmm, and with Going Rouge soon available, I can continue my Galtish ways.

That’s my first question when shopping books out of the wingnut remainder bins: Are the pages soft and absorbent?

Left by Chris Vosburg on October 10th, 2009

Appropos of nothing here, I’d like to take the opportunity to say that today (October 11) is the birthday of Anntichrist S. Coulter.
Let’s all wish her a Happy B-day and hope all is well, or at the very least, better than it has been!

Left by Bill S on October 11th, 2009

As for the African kid, I’ll tell you what. The energy that the African people put into daily survival, carving an existence out of hell and/or nothing, is huge.

The day will come when they will rise and the western world had better watch where they put their foot.

Just sayin’.

Also, per the junk in the backyard. Having now lived poor for most of my adult-life, I have become the translator for my family on the oft misunderstood ways of my now poor brethren.

When you are poor, you keep the broken, the unused, the planned for but defunct parts, because hell, you can make it into something or else, or worse, you can scrap it when metal goes up.

Fridges on the lawn; money in the bank. Its all the same in some people’s eyes.

Left by kate on October 11th, 2009

Something to say?