I know I should really limit my Swanking, or at least fight the urge whenever it appears. But you may have noticed that a lot of the pastor’s old haunts are making a bid for respectability these days, hoping to rise above the fevered depths of the cyber-swamps and attract advertising dollars and mainstream respect with the kind of professional integrity, magisterial tones, and thoughtful analysis found at Townhall, or WorldNetDaily. And the passionate penseés of the pastor, alas, have no place in this Brave New World of intelligible grammar. So let’s imbibe his insights while we may, before the pastor forsakes all proselytizing on the internet and retires to his church, where his stoop-shouldered figure will become a familiar sight as it paces the area which was known to early Christians as the “narthex,” but is better known to Swank’s parishioners (i.e., his wife) as “the mud room.”
The unfairness of the ‘Fairness Doctrine’
The so-called Fairness Doctrine is not at all fair.
Its bottom line is to mug conservative broadcasters. The Doctrine says that for every conservative caster there has to be a liberal caster.
World of Warcraft made the same mistake when they tried to balance the Mage and Warlock classes.
Liberals are not popular in their broadcasting as has been proven in the past.
…by the liberal media.
Conservative voices are the rage.
Well, let’s not generalize here. Some of them are the pout. Others are the whine. Many are the shrill.
Conservatives’ opinions will be blown to the wind as the Republic as we know it now would be completely turned inside out. Exit Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh, for instance.
Well I hope they exit before that Republic-blowing wind shows up, because the last thing I want to see is Rush Limbaugh turned inside out. It’d be like that scene in Jaws where Richard Dreyfuss slices open a shark’s belly and pulls out fish heads, three albacore swallowed whole, a crushed tin can and a license plate.
Anyway, that’s pretty much it, which worries me a bit. The pastor’s recent columns have all been uncharacteristically brief, and even those were padded out with cut-and-pasted news items. His piece on Sarah Palin, for instance, is downright terse.
It could be.
If Republican Senator Ted Stevens can win over his opponent Anchorage Mayor Mark Begich, Stevens lands back in Congress where he has sat for 40 years.
Stevens was convicted on seven felony counts of hiding gifts. He says he’s still going to bed down in DC.
However, if he gets to his usual haunts in the nation’s big time, the Senate may expel him. That leaves his seat empty.
Fill in the blanks. Sarah Palin runs for the Senate and gets elected.
Yeah, yeah, I suppose she could. But I miss the Swankian dithyrambs, damn it. The fractured syntax, the fanciful slurs, the sense that you were reading Arthur Bremer’s diaries ( “A Thundering of hooves and out of the western sky came the colored man”), except with less coherence and more paranoia. I wonder if the trauma of being dropped by a number of his outlets has caused Swank to grit his teeth and, by sheer force of will, tone it down a notch. Or if perhaps RenewAmerica actually assigned him an editor, and all she could salvage were half a dozen paragraphs of a single sentence each. Talk about the muzzling effect of the Fairness Doctrine!
Rupert Murdoch: Obama will ruin America’s economy
NEWS Corporation chairman Rupert Murdoch says B. Hussein Obama’s economic solution is “crazy.” His tax policies are not at all logical. [...]
Murdoch stated that B. Hussein’s promise to give tax rebates to 95 percent of Americans was “rubbish.”
That’s strong language.
Well, coming from the pastor of the New Hope Church and Bonus Room, I suppose so. Coming from a man who publishes a newspaper with topless women on page 3, it shows remarkable restraint.
But it’s time that reasonable voters get the truth-in-the-face or our Republic will soon be destroyed by the arch deceiver, B. Hussein.
Just to clarify: are we supposed to pronounce the “arch” in “arch deceiver” as “arc” like in “archangel,” or as “arch,” like in “Archie” or “the Golden Arches?”
B. Hussein is off the charts on most of his agendas because of the bottom line — he’s not experienced in anything but style and glitz. He’s all showmanship and connections with terrorist ties and the Islamic underground.
He’s like Wayne Newton singing “Daddy Don’t You Walk So Fast,” then blowing himself up with a large explosive eagle-shaped belt buckle
Making it worse is exactly what inexperienced B. Hussein and cadre will do to the Republic. They simply don’t have the know-how. They are jesters. They are shadow boxers. They are superficial to the limit.
They are a joker. They are a smoker. They are a midnight toker. They get their loving on the run. Wooo Woooo.
The are devilment in the flesh. Not good for the USA.
And yet devilment flesh is graded USDA Select.
Our downfall has already begun.
Devil your pleasure
Devil your fun
With Devilmint, Devilmint, Devilmint gum!
Left by fardles bear on November 13th, 2008