We haven’t checked in with Pastor Swank for awhile, but it appears he’s still busy expanding the Urban Dictionary.
It’s official: we now have a pastoral dispensation for scrotum-dipping.
The Tea Party Nation represents healthy-raw, committed patriotism. What a breath of fresh air.
It is, in fact, a naked breath of unpasteurized air-raw!
So the Reps had better keep their mitts off the Nation.
However, the Nation is still free to molest Mitt, although it’s kind of labor-intensive because you have to work a hand into his magic underwear before you can cop a decent feel.
Let the Nation form itself according to its own basic moorings. Trust the formation.
Says Knute Swank, All American.
America is hungry for true-blue citizens who don’t give a rip about political correctness, personal opportunism or blowing steamy air.
I always thought “ripping one” and “blowing steamy air” were the same thing, but I guess it’s all very different on Pandora.
Tea Party enthusiasts are the down the block Americans who have had it with Marxist Muslim Barack Hussein Obama and like clones hatched to his right and left. They cannot stomach Obama’s shadow government. They are ready to ax the pro-Islamic czars.
Sounds like a cross between Invasion of the Body Snatchers and Friday the 13th. Let’s call it Texas Chainsaw Tea Party.
Would not thinking, righteously angry, flag-waving human beings want to turn upside down the damnable bunk load in DC?
Oh, so it’s bukkake porn?
And so they are doing it. Then Reps had better let them carry on!
In the delightful British romp, Carry On Teabagging!
Therefore, today’s reality teaching that reveals Reps splicing and dicing for their own posterior protection, thus betraying common sense grassroots, means Tea baggers had better keep trucking down the right trail.
Okay, sorry, it appears the pastor’s opus is actually a slasher film with a refreshing splash of anal sex involving Mr. Natural and Mark Trail.
And they are on the right trail. They know it. Their heads think it. Their hearts beat it. Their souls confirm it.
Their steely man-lances sodomize it.
That’s saying a lot more for the so-called common men and women than many Reps straddling fences looking out for themselves. Enough straddling in the name of “Republican.”
The pastor recommends you start straddling in the name of “Sybian.”
Isn’t it thrilling to see these Tea Bag zealots lifting loftily the virtues America was known for decades ago? These are the ethics that have been swept away by Obama leftists beheading the country. These are the absolutes debunked even by some chancey Reps.
I assume from this passage that God caught Pastor Swank in Babylon, attempting to build a tower to heaven.
What Reps need to do is go to the Tea Bag committed, ask them how they do it, what they have faith in, and then side up to their genuine postulates.
Wow — a committed Tea Bagging and postulate-stimulation? We’re gonna have to hose this place down.
Everybody is saying the Reps don’t have a common base, a moral foundation, a solid ethical contract. There’s wishy-washy this and wishy-washy that.
So if that is true, Reps need to learn virtuous catechism from the Tea Bag Nation. The baggers know what that’s all about and are living it.
And who are we to criticize their lifestyle choices? Lift loftily your bunkload, Baggers, as you blow the steamy air with your healthy-raw Nation mitts!