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Archive for February 12th, 2008

There’s A Pubic Hair On My Presidential Candidate

Posted by scott on February 12th, 2008

Janet M. LaRue, a former Concerned Women of America, host of various SCTV programs, and current Townhall pundit, wants you to take part in a shocking thought experiment that will change the way you think…Forever!

Janet M. LaRue (far right) in undated file photo.

Sen. Barack Obama is highly intelligent, likeable, articulate (no racism intended)

It just slipped out.

…dynamic, well-educated and witty. He is receiving virtually worshipful coverage from the news media.

Now imagine the Republican presidential front runner is a highly intelligent, likeable, articulate, dynamic, well-educated and witty conservative.

Okay, but I’ll need drugs. You holding?

He is also black and formerly liberal. His name is Clarence Thomas.

Never mind. I see someone apparently licked the whole blotter before I could get to it.

What would be missing from the picture?

Melting clocks?

The adoring mainstream media, for one. What would we find? The rank racist comments, cartoons, editorials, speeches, etc., reserved for black conservatives by liberals of all colors.

When will conservatives finally summon the courage to take on all the liberal champions of racism, whether they be white, black, cranberry blush, soft azalea, heather graphite, tropical aqua, spring coral, celery, or loden.

Obama and Thomas are about as far apart politically as it gets. If they were cities, you’d need satellite tracking to pinpoint both, and they wouldn’t be in Georgia.

I have no idea what this paragraph means, but I do know that wherever Lewis Carroll is right now, he’s really, really jealous.

But there are important similarities. Both were deserted by their fathers and were primarily reared by their grandparents. And both have written an autobiography.

No wonder they keep getting each other’s mail.

In his book, Dreams from My Father: A Story of Race and Inheritance, he tells his boyhood search for identity and the rage he felt as a young black man…

You’d also need GPS technology to find any criticism of Obama’s “rage” or lashing out in the rave reviews of his book by the MSM…

Yes, Global Positioning Satellite technology is to today’s Formerly Concerned Woman what the words “space” and “atomic” where to yesteryear’s pulp science fiction writers: dimly grasped vectors for pizzazz!

Thomas also shares his transformation from liberal to conservative, which included intense interaction with Thomas Sowell, Walter Williams and other conservatives, black and white. Thomas also makes his case against those who would confine black Americans to liberal orthodoxy, as he did at his contentious confirmation hearing before the U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee.

Remember kids, it was all about liberating African-Americans from the intellectual plantations of liberal orthodoxy, and not about inviting female subordinates to lunch hour screenings of Long Dong Silver videos in your office.

Won’t it be wonderful when racism declines to the point that a black conservative has an equal chance to achieve the American dream without experiencing a nightmare at the hands of “abusive monsters?”

You’ll note that in the long history of abusive monsters, from Godzilla to Cloverfield, it’s always the black conservatives who die first.