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Just a quick update to our post below on Rick (“I prefer my actresses dead and busty”) Moran.  Over at Right Wing Nut House, Rick is back refapping–sorry, recapping 24, but he pauses to take note of our post, more in sorrow than in anger.  It seems that we missed the actual point of his disquisition on ruminant-hunting tits and the misuse of the word “lumpen” because Rick’s humor is too subtle.

Evidently, some poor schmucks on the left have the sense of humor of a potato and believe I am a hypocrite because I am a fat old man who disses the personal appearance of some of the cast members. In fact, as regular readers know, my descriptions are so over the top that they become a parody of themselves – sort of like Larry Flynt describing the late Jerry Falwell but without the gross sexual and bathroom references (no doubt since I didn’t include any scatological humor, the brainless twits didn’t recognize it as parody.)

Ah!  I see.  His words were a sly parody of a gaseous, self-satisfied misogynist who’s obnoxious enough to criticize — apropos of nothing in particular — the acting talent of a woman whose career was ended prematurely by murder, but still sensitive enough to praise her boobs.  It pains me to think of the many golden nuggets of implied humor I’ve missed when visiting Rick’s site in the past, so let’s take a moment now to appreciate the deft crafting of his multilayered japes:

Back at FBI headquarters, Hillinger is getting too nosy for our own good. The very first hour of the show it appeared he was involved in the plot when Janis caught him fooling around with the server. His explanation seemed plausible and we have hardly given him a thought since then. But the revelation that he is playing around on his wife with Miss Anorexia and his curiosity about the CIP module not being a threat anymore has us thinking once again – is he or isn’t he? Janis is oblivious to the possibility of Sean being the mole but knows that he’s fooling around with Miss Eating Disorder. We’ll see how that plays out as Miss Binge and Purge may play a key role in exposing Hillinger if he is the main mole at the FBI.

Well, I’m sure most of that went over my head, but I’d have to say this paragraph falls somewhere between the subtle wit of Anton Chekhov’s oeuvre, and the unintentional comedy of Pavel Chekov’s Monkees wig.

The scene in Lafayette Park with the confrontation between Larry and Jack over torture is one of the reasons I love the show. The series has always made a genuine effort to present realistic arguements for and against Jack’s tactics. And Renee, in this case, can be an “everyperson” character who is torn between necessity and her own personal morals. It’s an old dramatic device going back to the Greeks but it still works when done well.

Okay.  That was funny.

After handing over Gedge’s phone records, Larry is horrified to hear Jack ask about Vossler’s family. Bauer’s plan is to make Vossler think that they will hurt his family unless he tells them where Henry is. Jack makes it plain that he is disgusted with Larry for not seeing the truth – his truth – of the matter:

Jack: When are you people going to stop thinking that they are playing by your rules. They’re not!

He gives them a choice; either they can tell the president that their consciences wouldn’t allow them to rescue Henry or they will “do what is necessary” to get the job done. Reluctantly, Renee sees it Jack’s way but you can tell she is torn. She heads off to Vossler’s home where his wife and 11 month old child are about to receive a lesson in “asymetrical warfare” – Jack style.

Well, then.
Moist Towelette, anyone?

12 Responses to “Moran Wraps Himself in The Moral Mantle Of Flynt”

I don’t recall anyone saying he was a hypocrite, though I may have missed it. I believe we just said he was a fucking loser. I stand by that judgment.

“Can’t you take a joke?” is the plaintive cry of shamed bullies through the years. Sure we can, it’s just that you have to actually *make* one.

As I’ve said before, “Jane, you ignorant slut” is only funny if the people hearing you say it don’t believe you say it to every woman as a matter of course.

The very first hour of the show it appeared he was involved in the plot when Janis caught him fooling around with the server.

Nothing like sex with a machine to get ol’ Rick Moran’s bells chiming.

As I’ve said before, “Jane, you ignorant slut” is only funny if the people hearing you say it don’t believe you say it to every woman as a matter of course.

Naturally, that only happens when you put it clearly in the conext of parody, like the “Point/Counterpoint” parody that your example is firmly rooted in.

Rick, since you enjoy reading about yourself, see, this is how comedy works: you have to let people in on the joke, which usually means the set-up, the surprise, and then the punchline.

Now, clearly making fun of Sophia Coppola’s figure coming from Jabba the Nutt should have clued us in, but seeing as it comes from someone who is a) totally unfunny and b) a total jerk anyway, we missed that rather obvious crack, particularly as it comes after you make fun of the victim of a horrific murder.

I mean, jeez Louise, why didn’t you make the connection between Sharon Tate and Nicole Brown Simpson, two blonde no-talent actresses who’s fame was spread out all over their respective homes, since you decided to take pot shots at dead people?

If you’re going to engage in ugly humour for humour’s sake, then you have to make it relevant and most of all, funny.

Upon reflection, I guess his theory is that we’re objecting to his pervasive, casually cruel misogyny because he’s physically unattractive, rather than because it’s, you know, revoltingly unprovoked misogyny. Which seems to indicate he’s entirely missed the point.

Rick, we’re making fun of you for what you said. Your creepy woman-hating wouldn’t be any less offensive if you had the body of an Adonis.

Pointing out that you don’t is basically an attempt to shame you into realizing what an asshole you’re being by demonstrating that no one likes being taunted for their looks. Clearly a pointless endeavor as you apparently lack even a vestigial sense of empathy, but I like to hope we can be forgiven for not automatically thinking the very worst of you.

A few years ago I watched about 3 1/2 episoes of “24″ on DVD, and then threw the whole package away. Not only is it awful, it’s dull and stupid, too.

Asymmetric warfare Jack Bauer style? Terrorizing a woman and infant? Well, that IS funny. Maybe the baby is like Stewy on Fam.Guy.

This Moran makes me physically ill. Just imagine him sitting in front of his Wide-screen HD TV, beer at his side, cheetos in his lap, saying “Yeah baby, that’s the way to treat those RULE BREAKERS! Go Jack!”

“You see, it was satire, and you’re just too stupid to understand my subtle and delicate wit!” No, never heard that piece of back-pedalling before. Truly an original.

As D. Sidhe says, misogyny is misogyny, no matter how much you paint the word “satire” on it and expect people to fall for it. Jokes are supposed to be funny.

Rick, we’re making fun of you for what you said. Your creepy woman-hating wouldn’t be any less offensive if you had the body of an Adonis.

That he doesn’t is called “irony” and is the icing on the cake. Funny how he missed that nuance.

Mr. Moran:

some poor schmucks on the left have the sense of humor of a potato and believe I am a hypocrite because I am a fat old man who disses the personal appearance of some of the cast members. In fact, as regular readers know, my descriptions are so over the top that they become a parody of themselves – sort of like Larry Flynt describing the late Jerry Falwell but without the gross sexual and bathroom references (no doubt since I didn’t include any scatological humor, the brainless twits didn’t recognize it as parody.). Since it takes more than two brain cells working for the average three year old to figure this out on this site, the numbskulls who believe I have no business taking potshots at any character for their physical appearance can be forgiven their idiocy. Allow their brains to mature a bit before we judge them too harshly.

Just for the record, if you’d like to convince a group of people that you are a consummate parodist whose “over the top” comic stylings they were simply too dense to catch, it’s probably best to do so without simultaneously leaving the impression that you imagine there’s an annual medal awarded to the internet typist who crams the largest number of adjectives into a paragraph, or that words are mallets that can cudgel tiny brains at long distance. Some of us are, in fact, familiar enough with Over The Topiness to distinguish it from the comical hissing of the cornered North American opossum.

I’d say stick with the lard-assed misogyny; you’ve probably got a better chance of it coming back into style.

But what about Miss Orthorexia? Just what’s up with her? Then there’s that thing with Miss Bulimia – it has me thinking once again – does she or doesn’t she?

Then there’s that thing with Miss Bulimia – it has me thinking once again – does she or doesn’t she?

Well, she does. Just not for long.

Actually, I was not making fun of the moran for what he said, I just think he’s an asshole.

Rick, we’re making fun of you for what you said. Your creepy woman-hating wouldn’t be any less offensive if you had the body of an Adonis.

‘Tis true, but that picture of him was a perfect illustration of how the ol’ double standard operates. Now he wants to say he was making a joking comment about said double standard? Yeah right. More like he was caught being an asshole and wants to backpedal.

Good to know there’s a population of cretins who 1) watch 24, 2) think it’s a good show and 3) think Rick “50 pounds to go” Moran is the guy to go to for hot 24 explication.

Now I feel much better about 1) watching Tom and Jerry reruns with my three year old, 2) laughing out loud when Tom gets binged and 3) need to shed about 20 pounds after the snow melts.

I feel better because unlike Moran and his moraniacs, I have a life. A real job, real concern about the threats to our safety, and a real commitment to preventing anyone like Jack Bauer from ever holding a position of power in this country.

Now that Dick Cheney’s retired, that is.

Something to say?