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WorldNetDaily brings us this major breaking story:

NBC comedian: I love and trust Sarah Palin

Oooh, so Jay Leno is leaving his wife and taking up with Sarah? And he’s lost mind? This IS a big story!

‘People make fun of her because they’re afraid of her’

Well, not really. It’s true we were afraid when she occupied a position of power and made decisions that impacted on people’s lives, because you never want to have unqualified people in these jobs. But we made fun of her because she was clueless. But now she’s just a “celebrity,” and the only people afraid of her are her staff and family. But we still delight in making fun of her, because she’s so delightfully mockable.

Former “Saturday Night Live” star Victoria Jackson

So SHE’s the “NBC comedian”? She was a SNL cast member when the Gipper was in office, but I hardly think NBC still wants to claim her. Hey, it’s time to put a call into the FTC and report an instance of bait and switch.

“I trust Sarah Palin,” said Jackson, who will be taking part in WND’s upcoming “Taking America Back” national conference in Miami. “People make fun of her because they’re afraid of her, because she’s honest. Wow! What a new concept! An honest politician. I love her.”

I hope the two of you will be very happy together. And you do make a great couple, both of you being brainless and all.

In a July 4th New York radio interview with WND’s Aaron Klein, who will also take part at the Miami event, Jackson said, “I’m close to the conservatives on the radio and TV because those are the only people I’m exposed to.”

I understand there are vaccines now that can prevent the exposure from resulting in full-blown infection.

“I feel like Rush Limbaugh should be the president,” she noted. “He’s saying what we believe in better than anyone else.”

Well, we already knew that Victoria was a little dim, so I guess we shouldn’t be surprised when she makes statements like this. But you’d think even she would have the sense not to admit publicly that she wants an opiate-addicted dropout on his fourth marriage for President, because he says the kind of hateful, racist, sadistic, misogynistic stuff she believes in.

Jackson also has high praise for Glenn Beck of both TV and radio fame.

Of course she does.

As WND previously reported, Jackson released a YouTube video that’s gone viral,

We told YouTube to get its flu shots!

. . . warning the American public in song, “There’s a communist living in the White House.”

That would be the robotic Josef Stalin who is still stored in Dick Cheney’s secret bunker under the White House. Robotic Stalin came from the future to help Sarah Palin marry Chuck Connor, and thus cause the end of humanity.

Jackson, who noted she had never been involved in politics before Obama was elected, told Klein, “I don’t really care about little things, but this is a big thing!”

Jackson has long been known as a Hollywood conservative whiner (“Wah, I’m being blacklisted because of my beliefs and my lack of talent”). But it may be true that she only recently became involved in politics. After all, she never even voted until she was in her forties. As she confided to Breitbart, she was finally driven to the voting booth because she didn’t like a Clinton sound bit that she presumably saw on SNL.

It was that haughty look, lack of shame, and zero repentance combined with that asinine sentence…the meaning of the word ‘is’ .[…] So, I voted Clinton out. My vote counted. Bush won.

See, Victoria did know what “is,” means, and she didn’t think that anybody stupider than her should be President. Unfortunately, Clinton wasn’t running in that election since he’d already served two terms, but Victoria’s vote still counted and Bush did win. And that, kids, is how we got the worst president in modern times.

And, even more telling, Victoria never voted prior to 2000 because she didn’t know how. Seriously.

I didn’t know how. I didn’t know where to go. I never saw a sign that said, “Vote Here.” I didn’t know how to “register” or even that I had to register. I didn’t know what the candidates stood for or how to find out.

I guess this is electoral Darwinism in action.

But back to Victoria’s interview with Klein and her new-found political activism:

She said she wanted to find a clever way to spread the message about the communist threat Obama poses, and thought to herself, “Well, maybe if we could cloak it in entertainment or comedy maybe we could reach people who won’t read the Drudge Report or watch Fox News.”

So, she’s aiming her message at people who are even too stupid for Drudge and Fox News? Is it safe to tie up their scant brain cells watching a You Tube video when they might need them to control respiration?

Jackson thinks Christians and political conservatives are being blacklisted in Hollywood,

Okay, so she’s still a big Hollywood conservative whiner. What else is there for her and Patricia Heaton to do?

. . .and suggests many people are even afraid to say the word “communist” in a public forum.

I think what she means is that many people are afraid to call the President a communist in a public forum, because it causes doubts about their sanity.

When she appeared on “The O’Reilly Factor” on the Fox News Channel, she said it was her priority to get that specific word uttered, fearing that “Bill O’Reilly will cut me off after the first sentence.”

Once again, Victoria was confusing real life with SNL, and what she feared was that Dan Ackroyd would call her an ignorant slut.

“I’m very proud that I was one of the first who was brave enough to tell the truth,” she said. “It’s kind of like ‘The Emperor’s New Clothes.’ It’s like it takes an airhead to say, ‘Look, the emperor’s naked!’ You know what I’m saying?”

Yes, honey, we do. Congratulations on being the Airhead who Saved the World From Naked Commies. I just hope you don’t have to fight Glen Beck for the title.

Anyway, we assume that you’ll get more of Victoria’s brilliant observations about politics and probably some of her singing if you attend that “Taking America Back to the Middle Ages” conference. But she’s not the only fluff head who will be speaking! Besides Michele Bachmann and Ann Coulter, whom we mentioned earlier, the conference also includes “Hannah Giles, heroine of the ACORN sting.”

You remember Hannah, Doug’s dim daughter who pretended to be a whore in order to break state wire-tapping laws so she could disenfrachise black voters and, um, get on TV. Anyway, she’s now a “young celebrity-activist.” Farah Fawcett WorldNetDaily promies that she will “bring to the conference a combination of insight, new ideas about tactics and strategies for taking America back and plenty of fun.”

Insight about what, you might ask? Well, not about ACORN, because she doesn’t know anything about it, as Scott pointed out back in the day. And not even about conservatism, because even though she was given a gig at Town Hall, all she was able to convince anyone of is that thinking isn’t her forte. Remember this gem from Hannah?

Sen. Clinton presumptuously bellowed from her podium, “republicans should hold a press conference, apologize to the country for what they have put us through and then decide they are not going to run.”

Now, lets take a moment to analyze and discuss this concept that Sen. Hillary Clinton just birthed: She wants the Republicans to hand the 2008 election to the Democrats. Sounds like a great idea, if you are a fan of communism, and an admirer of men like Fidel Castro and Hugo Chavez.

And when a person as influential and well-known as Sen. Hillary Clinton suggests that the Republicans forfeit their place in the competitive American political arena, she is asking them to submit. America has never submitted: Not to the British during the Revolutionary War, not to the Japanese after the bombings of Pearl Harbor, not to the torments of communism and certainly not to the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11, 2001. If America has not submitted before, then how can (and why is) Sen. Clinton asking at least half of the country to do so now? Due to the constant presence of underlying dogma, it is absolutely essential that the American people read deeper and understand what is being said and done during the fast times of presidential campaigning. After all, the free and prosperous American life depends on it.

Yeah, reading and understanding is essential and stuff. Thanks, Hannah.

But hey, even if Hannah isn’t exactly a rocket scientist of the right, I’m sure she can add “plenty of fun” to the conference — especially if she dresses up in hooker threads again for her presentation.

Hannah and Pimp Stut Their Stuff

16 Responses to “Airheads For American and Stuff”

It was that haughty look, lack of shame, and zero repentance combined with that asinine sentence…the meaning of the word ‘is’ .[…] So, I voted Clinton out. My vote counted. Bush won.

I suppose it’s the soft bigotry of low expectations, but why does this not surprise me?

Isn’t Bush beating Clinton a LOT like giving out ribbons to every competitor in a 100 yard race for five year olds?

Unfortunately, just before the wedding, Chuck was branded a coward and discharged from the military. Sarah couldn’t abide the scandal and promptly quit their engagement, and Chuck went off to live in an isolated cabin with their out-of-wedlock son and his large gun collection, telling the townsfolk his wife had died. Sad, really.

According to the Internet Movie Database, Vic’s reign of blandness on SNL was from 1986-92. The final two years of Reagan’s term and the Bush Sr’s presidancy. It was also the period when the other two female cast members were Jan Hooks & Nora Dunn, who got more laughs in a single Sweeny Sisters skit that Jackson did in 6 years.
And I’ve seen a bit of her standup act-it’s excruciatingly awful.
In fact, the only time she’s funny is when she’s trying to sincere, praising the biggest asshat wingnuts alive. I wanted to believe it was a put-on, but she’s just not smart enough.

Wow. Good ol’ Victoria made a convincing case to tell us how profoundly ignorant she used to be but now she’s supposedly better and stuff?

Uh huh.

She said she wanted to find a clever way to spread the message

Okay, Miss, I think I see your problem there…

We were watching UHF the other night, and I noted that she’s probably at least three times as dumb as she comes across in that movie. My partner said, “Yeah, but she’s adorable!” And I thought, You know, it’s true. Women are from Venus… Other women… are from, I guess, outer space or something.

And I’ve seen a bit of her standup act

Willingly?

On Comedy Central, out of curiousity, after catching a bit of an interview on “The 700 Club”(accidently, while channel surfing.) I wondered what kind of act a wingnut Jesus-freak would come up with.
I’ve also seen bits of Brad Stine’s, and it’s just as bad.

“I understand there are vaccines now that can prevent the exposure from resulting in full-blown infection.”

Among VJ’s many delusions is her belief that vaccines cause autism. I thought her appearances on SNL were ironic commentary, not documentary evidence of her lack of connection to reality. I thought her stupidity and willful ignorance were an act. To allude to another favorite blog: Sadly, no.

I thought it was Jenny McCarthy who believed that about vaccines, though of course it could be both of them.

After I was released from prison and right after Sarah Palin and I broke up I became a Baptist minister in Alaska.

The prison thing…well, what’re ya gonna do? One minute you’re standing on a street corner in Milwaukee minding your own business and then the voices start. Next thing you know you’re in handcuffs and making a facial impression on the hood of a black and white with a semi-naked woman screaming something about you in the background. What?!? C’mon!

After prison I got tired of having to go around with a deputy introducing myself to my neighbors every time I moved, so I did the John Wayne thing and went “North to Alaska”.

Alaska was good and Sarah was…well let me tell you about her.

It was me who sold her on the idea of the tanning bed in the governor’s office, not that dork, Todd. He was the one who wanted to use government money to buy it…said an overall tan on Sarah was a legitimate business expense and then he gave that little snide snicker and wink that irritates the hell out of me. (and Sarah, too).

Anyway, I met Sarah at a moose call class at the community college and the immediate electricity between us was palpable. I told her that later. She nuzzled into me, smiled and said, “I’ll tell ya, When you walked into the moose call class my heart really began to palpable.” That’s Sarah the romantic. A part of her few know. Especially that dork, Todd.

We spent many nights under the aurora borealis making little baby moose calls to each other as we slipped into that wonderful passion that only true love, the aurora, and a gallon of Carlo Rossi burgundy can bring on. She called me ‘Hombre’ I called her ‘Sassy’. I was enamored not necessarily by the full-body tan, a weakness that might have had something to do with the incident in Milwaukee, no, I think it was that sort of crossed eye thing she has going. You probably don’t know it but she has 125 pairs of glasses, all the same. Wild!

Anyway, things were going along pretty good between Sarah and I, but then the phone calls started. First it was John McCain (another dork), then Rupert Murdoch (a bigger dork). I tried to explain to her that those dorks were using her but, bless her little heart, she saw the future, the mountain top, the designer wardrobe. (Yeah, she’s a woman, too, damn it!)

Then the press came and I couldn’t even go out in my back yard and take a leak (An Alaskan right of passage when the temp is 30 below!) without some reporter popping up and asking me questions.
McCain and Murdoch knew about me. Yeah, they knew, but they convinced her that she had to stay with Todd for “political continuity” or something like that. Dorks stick together.

She would sneak into my apartment in disguise. And that’s another funny story; sometimes she would be dressed as a reindeer, other times Heidi Fleiss and even one time as Hillary Clinton. I never knew what disguise she would wear. One time there was a knock on the door and there she was dressed as a donkey. I tried to pull her into my room for half an hour and didn’t realize it was a real donkey until Sarah showed up behind it dressed like a Russian storm trooper. (She knows her foreign policy!) We laughed until our sides ached and then fell on the bed. Our eyes locked (Well, sort of, what with that kinda crossed-eye thing) and we slipped into our world of unrestrained passion.

Anyway, her costumes were our own private joke I will always cherish. Our last night together she came in dressed as a gorilla with a birthday party cone-hat on. She put her arms around me and whispered in my ear, “John and Rupert say I gotta stay with the dork.” That was it! She turned, gorilla-jumped up on a table that broke under her weight, stumbled sideways over some chairs, opened my closet, and disappeared. A moment later she came out of the closet and with up-turned palms and a shrug of her gorilla shoulders mumbled ‘whoops’ and went out the door into the cold Alaska night. Moments later I heard the crash of trash cans, then a “Damn!” and that was the last I saw of her.

It hurt. It hurt like a tear wound from one of those wolves Sarah used to shoot from that oil company helicopter. She was gone. What could I do? I picked up my pastor certificate on the Internet that very same night and sought solace in service to my flock. Thanks to a generous congregation and a crafty accountant I’m richer now than I could have ever imagined. But for all my wealth and power what is most priceless is the note I got from Sarah just last year. It said, “Hombre, My heart still palpables when ever I think of ya’. Love, Sassy.”##

At least she knew who the US got its independence from and who attacked at Pearl Harbor – so that puts a floor under how ignorant she is. According to this poll
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2010/07/03/2010-07-03_26_of_us_dont_know_who_we_declared_indepence_from_marist_poll.html

26% of Americans don’t know who the US declared independence from. I can practically guarantee that at least some of those 74% of the “well informed” are not so well informed as to know who attacked at Pearl Harbor so, although I more or less agree with every critcism so far the sad fact is that she is in the top 70% or so for being informed.

I thought her appearances on SNL were ironic commentary, not documentary evidence of her lack of connection to reality.

She thought she was filming a documentary.

Left by Former Sarah Lover on July 8th, 2010

I don’t know who this is, but…I tip my hat. Bravo or Brava as appropriate.

TWUNT.

Left by Former Sarah Lover on July 8th, 2010

I second Actor. Well played sir. Well played.

Scott should really post FSL’s essay, for all to read.
It is a thing of beauty.

Something to say?