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elliswashington.jpgYou may remember Ellis Washington, the part-time instructor at Savannah State University who styles himself a “professor of law and political science,” in much the same way I inform bouncers and maitre’ds that I’m a NASCAR champion and the crown prince of Liechtenstein.

Around these parts Ellis is probably best known for getting the point of Orwell’s 1984 completely backwards, but the professor is large, he contains multitudes, and he also thoroughly misunderstood the 1991 film, The Silence of the Lambs:

In an earlier article titled, “The Savage Silence of the Lambs,” I compared the Machiavellian and unjust blacklisting of Savage by our strongest ally, England, to the movie “Silence of the Lambs.” Here is Part 2 of that offering. As a reference, I quote in part from my original article of May 20:

In the 1991 movie “Silence of the Lambs,” …Lecter (Anthony Hopkins), a brilliant but evil psychiatrist, begins a game of quid pro quo with Clarice Starling (Jodie Foster), a young FBI trainee…In one telling scene, Starling tells of how she was orphaned, relocated to an uncle’s farm, discovered the horror of the lambs going to the slaughterhouse and unsuccessfully tried to save one of the little lambs.  That horrific, indelible scene that haunted her all those years was the lambs’ seeming indifference and silence in the face of utter slaughter.

Yep.  Except the point of that “indelible scene” was that Agent Starling was haunted by the screaming of the lambs, and hoped that by helping a kidnapped young woman escape death at the hands of a serial killer, she could finally silence their screams:

Hannibal Lecter: Then something woke you, didn’t it? Was it a dream? What was it? [...]
Clarice Starling: It was… screaming. Some kind of screaming, like a child’s voice. [...] Lambs. The lambs were screaming.
Hannibal Lecter: They were slaughtering the spring lambs?
Clarice Starling: And they were screaming.
Hannibal Lecter: You still wake up sometimes, don’t you? You wake up in the dark and hear the screaming of the lambs.
Clarice Starling: Yes.
Hannibal Lecter: And you think if you save poor Catherine, you could make them stop, don’t you? You think if Catherine lives, you won’t wake up in the dark ever again to that awful screaming of the lambs.

Hannibal Lecter: Well, Clarice – have the lambs stopped screaming?

You may also recall that the professor believes his man-crush, Michael “Savage” Weiner, is the modern day incarnation of Prometheus, and has been unfairly abused by both Zeus and the British Home Secretary.

Do you hear that sound, America? It is the tormenting sound of crickets chirping. It is the sound of Prometheus groaning in utter agony as his liver is daily eaten by a giant eagle commanded by Zeus. … It is the sound of the Savage silence of the lambs.

So a man having his vital organs devoured by a raptor makes the same sound as crickets chirping, which make the same sound as lambs making no sound at all?

Okey dokey.

Why, after two weeks since the release of a major profile of Michael Savage by the venerable liberal magazine The New Yorker, has not one TV network, not one major newspaper, not one conservative, libertarian or independent think tank, not one liberal or conservative talk show host invited Michael on their show to interview him regarding this unique and monumental achievement?

It is the Savage silence of the lambs.

Michael Savage’s career is being systematically destroyed by a conspiracy of ungulate mimes!

New Yorker magazine writer Kelefa Sanneh did an excellent job in profiling my friend and intellectual mentor, Michael Savage, not because he was complimentary or unduly fawning of his subject, but because he was fair, honest and introspective in his psychological treatment of this authentic American conservative intellectual. Kelefa effectively moved himself out of the way and allowed the reader to use his own intelligence to understand Dr. Michael Savage, the man.

By this point in the column, Professor Washington was so far up Dr. Savage’s sigmoid colon that he ran into Tom Sawyer and Becky Thatcher coming the other way, pursued by Injun Joe.

I would like to echo the comments by Jeff Kuhner who frequently hosts “The Savage Nation” in Michael’s absence, particularly his revelatory monologue on Aug. 5. Jeff eloquently voiced the passions and frustrations of Michael and “The Savage Nation” audience, pointing out that normally when someone is profiled in the revered New Yorker magazine, they are granted instant celebrity status and given entree to all of the major network news, cable, newspapers and radio media.

Yeah!  And when a caricaturist depicts you and your wife as terrorists on the cover, you get to be president!  That’s the law!

In other words, everyone knows that a profile in the New Yorker is usually a career maker, not a career breaker. However, with the conservative nationalist Michael Savage, all one has heard over the past two weeks since the publication of his New Yorker magazine profile was the deafening Savage silence of the lambs.

To be fair, though, most ruminants read Kerrang! and Good Housekeeping.

In conclusion, compare the Michael Savage affair to Josef Stalin’s redacting of history.

Um.  Okay…

Look at the pictures above: If Stalin’s own personal assassin and chief of his notorious secret police, the NKVD, wasn’t safe from Stalin’s “purges,” what makes the GOP, the RNC, conservative radio hosts, National Review, the Weekly Standard, Fox News and the rest of the state-controlled media think they will be safe from President Obama’s fascist and censorship tactics? Surely these people and organizations must know they will be next.

So it’s Stalin’s fault that people don’t care Michael Savage was mentioned in The New Yorker?

What, therefore, is the response from all the champions defending freedom of speech and freedom of expression regarding the case of Michael Savage, this modern-day Alfred Dreyfus affair?

Right, right, I forgot.  Savage is a man of many metaphors: Prometheus, a soft-spoken sheep, and Alfred Dreyfus.

… All I can hear is the hypocritical, unconsoling Savage silence of the lambs!

Oh, sorry, Prof, I couldn’t hear the silent lambs.  I had John Cage’s 4′33″ turned way up.

40 Responses to “Lambchop Silently Savages The Weiner”

“Don’t you know the story of Hercules and the lion?”

“Is it a Bible story?”

“Yeah, probably. Anyway, once upon a time, there was a big mean lion who got a thorn in his paw. All the village people tried to pull it out, but nobody was strong enough! So, they got Hercules. And Hercules used his mighty strength, and Bingo! Anyway, the moral is, the lion was so happy, he gave Hercules this big…thing…of riches.”

“How did a lion get rich?”

“It was the olden days!”

I can’t imagine why that made me think of this.

New Yorker magazine writer Kelefa Sanneh did an excellent job in profiling my friend and intellectual mentor, Michael Savage

Wait, HE’S your “intellectual mentor”?! No wonder you sound developmentally disabled!

I had John Cage’s 4′33″ turned way up.

Or was it Mike Batt’s condensed cover version “A Minute of Silence”?

Batt was famously sued for his piece– which “acknowledge[d] the work of John Cage”, according to the liner notes– by the estate of John Cage for intellectual property theft. Seriously.

Far and away the best snark offered was by Mike Batt’s Mum, who wanted to know “which minute of his piece are they saying you copied?”

Batt himself boasted, after cheerfully contributing a six-figure sum to the Cage Foundation, that his was the far better piece, having conveyed in only a minute that which took Cage four and a half minutes to say.

Oh, sorry, Prof, I couldn’t hear the silent lambs. I had John Cage’s 4′33″ turned way up.

Nothing constructive to say about this (darn you, Vosburg, and your relevant anecdotes). It just made me smile.

Uh, yeah. I read the article. It was not only fawning, but smarmy as hell to boot. It was the long form version of “He’s not a bigot, you ragheads/bitches/niggers just need to lighten up! These jokes are *funny*!”

Michael Savage is what PJ O’Rourke would be without the ability to complete sentences and handle his liquor. Kelefa Sanneh is Beavis ruthlessly self-medicating away any vestiges of self-awareness or intelligence so Butt-Head will like him. Ellis Washington is like Jonah Goldberg trying to prove Roger Ebert is overpaid. His relationship with Michael Savage is like those pictures Stephen Colbert keeps showing to demonstrate he has a black friend.

…when someone is profiled in the revered New Yorker magazine, they are granted instant celebrity status and given entree to all of the major network news, cable, newspapers and radio media.
In other words, everyone knows that a profile in the New Yorker is usually a career maker, not a career breaker. However, with the conservative nationalist Michael Savage, all one has heard over the past two weeks since the publication of his New Yorker magazine profile was the deafening Savage silence of the lambs.

Please note the goalposts on the move: it is not now enough to be profiled in loving detail by the Librul EmEssEm; now, if that does not make you instantly beloved by the masses, it’s an example of LIBERAL FASCISM!

The word “intellectual” should no more be used in connection with Mike Savage than the word “bootylicious” should be used in connection with Phyllis Schlafley.

One might think that the only vestige of censorship that should be listened to is the voice in your head warning you to STFU and not spurt out complete errors and inanity, you know, just to maintain the semblance that you’re not fucked up so much.

All I gotta say to Bill S. is, “Guy, you sure know how to infect teh brain wiv indelibly nauseating pitchers.” And, brain bleach. Also.

Maybe if someone told Savage Wiener that English Law is different from America’s, he might not want to visit so desperately.

Savage Wiener doesn’t seem to know that:

England doesn’t have a “Bill of Rights” guaranteeing the people total freedom-of-speech or complete freedom-of-the-press either. Nor do they have a Second Amendment. It is illegal to own *most* firearms.

It’s not the “American Way”, but the English seem fairly satisfied with their laws.

Wiener wouldn’t be able to scream any-old-thing he wants over the airwaves, nor could he wave his Uzi or Magnum 44 around in his cold dead hand.

[quote]Do you hear that sound, America? It is the tormenting sound of crickets chirping. It is the sound of Prometheus groaning in utter agony as his liver is daily eaten by a giant eagle commanded by Zeus. … It is the sound of the Savage silence of the lambs.[/quote]

Like some crazy stew made of peach cobbler, chicken tikka masala, and Jeno’s Pizza Rolls.

Aw, thanks, politcalcat. I try. If you want, I’ll try to think of an image to chase that one outta your brain. Just say the word…

Oh, never mind, I see Capmconnundrum beat me to it.

Ellis Washington writes: In an earlier article titled, “The Savage Silence of the Lambs,” I compared the Machiavellian and unjust blacklisting of Savage by our strongest ally, England, to the movie “Silence of the Lambs.”

In addition to being clueless about the genesis of the title, he doesn’t appear to understand the meaning of “Machiavellian”, which refers to crafty subterfuge or underhanded duplicity, i.e., in the style of Machiavelli’s Prince.

Britain’s Home Secretary Jacqui Smith could not possibly have been more straightforward about the reason Michael Savage (islamophobe, homophobe, whaddayagotaphobe) along with fellow Stateside Party Clowns Don Black (white supremacist) and Fred Phelps (homophobe), was persona non wanta:

“I think it’s important that people understand the sorts of values and sorts of standards that we have here, the fact that it’s a privilege to come and the sort of things that mean you won’t be welcome in this country.”

Perhaps a clever ruse to throw us off track. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

I’d have more respect for the guy if he had said his intellectual mentor was Elmer Fudd. I’m not sure it is possible to make a stupider statement.

Good lord this Washington is dumb. He’s also amazingly impressed with his own supposed intelligence, he’s like Jonah Goldberg times ten. You couldn’t make this guy up!

What you talkin bout Ellis writes: Do you hear that sound, America? It is the tormenting sound of crickets chirping.

Oh! Stealing through my body! Creeping though my veins! Pouring in my blood! Oh, DARTS OF FIRE IN MY BRAIN! STABBING ME! I CAN’T STAND IT! I WON’T!

–Buckley, in The Maniac, 1934, Dir Dwayne Esper

Thank you!~ Thank you!

unfortunately some of those lambs grew up to be sheep bleating ” Four Legs Good, Two Legs Bad keep the Gubmint off my Medicare”

Good catch on the Machiavellian slip, Chris. There’s so much stupidity in Washington’s column you can’t blame scott (or me, or anyone else) for missing some of it.
It’s almost as if EVERYTHING he writes means the exact OPPOSITE of what he MEANT to say.

Every day is opposite day in Washington World!

Kathy writes: England doesn’t have a “Bill of Rights” guaranteeing the people total freedom-of-speech or complete freedom-of-the-press either.

Well, England did adopt the European Convention guarantee of “freedom of expression” in the late nineties into its domestic laws as the “Human Rights Act of 2000″, which is quite similar to the actual speech guarantees in the states, so things have changed a bit since Thomas More got the chop. One difference I’ve noticed in the English law is that speech inciting racial hatred or religious hatred isn’t protected (which may explain why Savage isn’t welcome there, since it’s the only kind he knows).

‘Course, we’re still struggling with that here, due to the unspecificity of the First Amendment as written.

Things may change, depending on who’s on the bench when such cases come up.

Curious: anybody know if flag-burning is protected expression in England?

Yeah, “allowing the reader to use his own intelligence”, a hallmark of wingnut reportage.

Glad to learn that everything I imagined about Kelefa Sanneh was justified; restores my faith in making snap judgements about people with zero musical taste, poor writing and critical-thinking skills, and a willingness to inflict all of the above on an innocent public just because there’s money in it.

“By this point in the column, Professor Washington was so far up Dr. Savage’s sigmoid colon that he ran into Tom Sawyer and Becky Thatcher coming the other way, pursued by Injun Joe.”

Absofuckinglutely CLASSIC. You gotta frame that one, kiddo. Beautiful.

IN CONTRAST:

“The word “intellectual” should no more be used in connection with Mike Savage than the word “bootylicious” should be used in connection with Phyllis Schlafley.”

Ow. OW OW OW OW OW OW FUCKIN’ ***OWWWW***, DAMMIT!!!!!!

I wouldn’t worry about those Mormon and/or Scientology missionaries arriving on your doorstep, Bill. Now it’s PERSONAL.

Be afraid. Be very fucking afraid.

Now, Heydave: “One might think that the only vestige of censorship that should be listened to is the voice in your head warning you to STFU and not spurt out complete errors and inanity, you know, just to maintain the semblance that you’re not fucked up so much.”

I, sadly, have to disagree. Your statement supposes that “intellectuals” like Washington and his bromantic obsession, Savage, were actually born WITH this capability, or that they had it and STILL have it, which is obviously not the case. You give them far, far too much credit, intellectually and developmentally. They ain’t never gonna grow up, therefore their bullshit filters are never gonna grow in. They will stay self-hypnotized, self-deluded, babbling sheepul FOLLOWERS as long as they continue to graze upon the stupidity of their meager herd of followers (squared).

And no, Vosburg, no idea if flag-burning is protected in the U.K., but considering that they’ve allowed the Union Jack to be appropriated by everybody from the Sex Pistols to every single fucking souvenir-hawking douche on the islands, I somehow don’t think that they take their flag any more (actually) seriously than capitalists take OUR flag, until it comes to the actual pyro-activities. Boxer shorts covering big, fat, gelatinous asses with “Old Glory”? Hey, no problem! Skanks with semi-automatic rifles wearing the stars & stripes as a bikini (with or without Palin’s empty head photoshopped onto them)? Rock on! Some dirty commie librul PROTESTER TRAITOR PINKO ANARCHIST BASTARD wants to burn it to mourn the separation of this country from its founding ideals and, y’know, REALITY? FRY THOSE FUCKIN’ HIPPIES!!!!!!

BTW, Preznit & HeyDave, if y’all get a chance, along with all of the wunnerful WoC regs & lurkers, please swing by my now-censored blog (Mark Of The Beast) for a rather shoddy but sincere thank-you for your help through this long, drawn-out clusterfuck known as spinal-cord surgery that still ain’t over yet. XOXOXO

http://anntichristscoulter.blogspot.com/2009/08/it-aint-much-but-its-somethin.html

As a last add on speech, I’ll note that Brit sensibilities long ago abandoned the taboo on expletives like Fuck in order to devote more time to those that actually carry some offensive weight, like, say, Nigger, or Cunt.

Sorry for that, but I needed to make the point.

The reason one can say “crap” but not “shit” on TV continues to elude me, and well, you know the rest.

And as a last last honest ta gawd add, the wikipedia entry for fuck, including famous utterances by politicians and on-air personalities, as well as a section on redubbing instances for broadcast television showings of films such as The Big Lebowski (example: “this is what happens when you FIND A STRANGER IN THE ALPS!”).

[laughing] My comment above is “awaiting moderation”. Gosh, was it something I said? Annti, does this ever happen to you?

Wait, let me rephrase: Annti, does this ever not happen to you?

Incidentally, Annti, I just paid a visit to your blog and would have left the following comment had not “registration” been required:

I just cued up Paul McCartney’s english music hall tune “when I’m sixty-four” in honor of the amount of time we’ve endured the knowledge of nuclear annihilation of perfect strangers for no good reason.

It’s creepy: “will you still need me, will you still feed me” sent chills up my spine. Yes, we will, as long as we hate, distrust, and fear.

So, uh, nice blog!

Hey, it ain’t like I said she WAS boo-
never mind. Criminy, some folks gots no sense of humor.
I was a baaaad boy. Maybe I need a spanking. Preferably from Gerard Butler.

Well, Bill, Gerard is a huge man-slut, so you never know, he might get in touch with his big-burly-bi-curious side, one of these days… But I wouldn’t count on keeping him. You know how those bi-boys are. But after the pain you inflicted upon me and everybody else with eyeballs, you are sooooooo not worthy of that particular beefcake, with CGI enhancement or without. We MIGHT give you Mimi Bobeck/Cathy Kinney… if you hose her face down, she looks a LOT like a dood. I can at least promise you facial hair more coarse than my own Translucent-Werewolf genealogy.

And thanks for swingin’ by, Vosburg. Don’t sweat the Google mandatory-bar-code-on-the-back-of-the-neck thing, we’ll all belong to that brave new world, sooner or later.

And the Wo’C censoring-server issues DO get me, from time to time, (not NEARLY as often as you’d think, jackass!) but Scott’s always good and thoughtful enough to follow-up on those little oopsies. No idea where the glitch is, but yes, it is more than irksome, considering that this is one of the LAST true refuges of First Amendment rights. I’m SO glad that Wo’C isn’t on Blogger, ’cause no little pussy-ass chickenshit reich-winger fucktard will EVER get THEM censored. There’s a lot to be said for owning your own domain, for damned sure. So be patient, and take it as a badge of honor, dear Chris. Otherwise, you’ll do nasty things to your own computer whilst popping an aneurysm.

I love the “When I’m 64″ reference, even though I’m no big McCartney fan. Personally, I think that the old myth about the Stones selling their souls (and Brian) to the “Devil” is just a flipped tale about the Beatles, and that Paul offered up John and George in exchange for a long, sinfully-wealthy life. They were, after all, the best ones. And even if you worship and adore the man now known as The Other Angela Landsbury, you know, in your heart, that I’m right. So nyeh-nyeh nah boo-boo.

P.S. Vosburg: My standing on the word “Cunt” is that, if you OWN one, you can SAY IT. Jesus’ General and I hadda come to a sort of understanding about that, especially to the etymology of “REPUBLICUNT(S)”, but I ain’t NEVER givin’ it up, for anybody.

Read “Lady Chatterly’s Lover,” for fuck’s sake!

When used lovingly and worshipfully, it’s a beauty. When used pejoratively and/or cruelly, well, it’s sad that the vagina is used as an INSULT, ’cause it shows how the male shapers of the language FEAR that place. SOOOOO pathetically freudian. But it still works.

The mental image you just put in MY head requires the same amount of brain bleach (even if it did make me laugh my ass off), so I’d say we’re even.

A quick search of Savannah State U’s website informs one that a)Ellis doesn’t teach law, and b)Ellis isn’t even full-time faculty. Our conservative friends really know where to dig em up, don’t they.

So, if I read the article carefully, I would read that info in the first paragraph…Watching Big Brother with the wife is dropping my IQ! I might start voting R if this keeps up!

I don’t think so, Bill. Schafley was the icing on the fucking cake. WAY worse than that mild little imagery of Cathy & a firehose…

You don’t get your spanking AT ALL.

As the sadist said to the masochist, after hearing, “Whip me! Beat me! Tie me in chains!”, a well-measured, calm and cool, “NO.”

But I *am* gonna tell Cathy where you live, in case she ever gets bored.

P.S. Vosburg: My standing on the word “Cunt” is that, if you OWN one, you can SAY IT. Jesus’ General and I hadda come to a sort of understanding about that, especially to the etymology of “REPUBLICUNT(S)”, but I ain’t NEVER givin’ it up, for anybody.

Well, I don’t own one, and I consider it a deeply offensive word, so I’m not likely to use it again, except in the context above.

Since you used it and didn’t get a slap on the wrist from the comment software, I’m assuming that it is the word Nigger that set the software’s offense trapping off. I’ll just punch the “post” button and we’ll see if this is so.

Nigger.

Nope, the offense trapping let it fly. Oh, god, it wasn’t the word Fuck, was it?

No, that one flew too.

Scott?

Good! I loved her in “Parting Glances”. Thanks. :)

“pointing out that normally when someone is profiled in the revered New Yorker magazine, they are granted instant celebrity status ”

Uh, normally when someone is profiled in the “revered” New Yorker magazine, they’re already celebrities.

Vosburg: See also: “When used lovingly and worshipfully, it’s a beauty. When used pejoratively and/or cruelly, well, it’s sad that the vagina is used as an INSULT, ’cause it shows how the male shapers of the language FEAR that place. SOOOOO pathetically freudian. But it still works.”

Kay?

And dammit, Bill, if you’re not going to SUFFER when I punish you, then dammit, YOU DON’T DESERVE THE ATTENTION! Hmph. Go wrecking all my best-laid plans… hmmm… I wonder how the former “Mimi Bobeck” would feel about tying you up and torturing you with heterosexuality until you screeeeeeammmm like a little girl… “Are the lambs silent now, Clarice?”

a game of quid pro quo

Quid pro quo, you see, is Latin for “Cat and mouse.”

Something to say?