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underwood1.jpg

Apologies for leaving the place unchaperoned the past few days (although you kids have been remarkably well behaved — I expected to find a pizza affixed to the ceiling and a hairline crack in my Steuben glass egg).  The week is turning into an Interstate 5-style pile-up of meetings and deadlines, and my efforts to get Pastor Swank to guest blog have so far been unsuccessful, so posting may be light for the next few days.

And now, in accordance with our laws and our traditions, I have left an example of vintage typewriter-related erotica below the fold.  Enjoy.

 royal10avecnude.jpg

Feel free to caption the image.  She looks like she’s stuck for one.

28 Responses to “Deadline? I Didn’t Even Know It Was Sick”

Hey! She’s a rerun!

No, no, check her first appearance:

http://tinyurl.com/o89el4

and you’ll see this is the second half of her pictorial. Ventral, rather than dorsal view this time.

This is a Dvorak typewriter. I can’t use a Dvorak typewriter. You need clothes for that.

actor212 fell into the same trap as me, i.e. recognising that the typewriter was the same and not paying attention to the rest of the picture.

actor212 fell into the same trap as me, i.e. recognising that the typewriter was the same and not paying attention to the rest of the picture.

You guys are deeply, deeply disturbed.

“Either that wallpaper comes off, or I do.”

“I honestly never expected Invisible Correction Fluid to affect my clothes.”

“What a woman has to do to have her work noticed in this giant, soulless corporation.”

“Who’s grandma’s little Nom de Plume? Who’s got a smile for grandma?”

Um…grandma?

“I’m sending my resume to an employer with a better dress code.”

“I can’t spell.”

“Who cares?”

You guys are deeply, deeply disturbed.

Meh.

You seen one hip bone, you seen them all.

Wait…is that an actual nipple????

BOOBIES!

Here’s hoping the Miss Secretary Pageant organization has less strict rules than the Miss USA folks.

I am immune to the siren call of the BOOBIES!

Are those shoes the right ones for this line of work? They look uncomfortable.

I don’t do ‘deeply’. Rest assured that my disturbance is as shallow as the rest of my personality.

Hey! That’s my wife!

Are those shoes the right ones for this line of work? They look uncomfortable.

Left by Bill S on May 14th, 2009

Boobs you can ignore, but accessories?

“Oh, Underwood! I thought you said underwear!”

Ba-dump-bum.

Yes, actor. I’m THAT gay. Go figger.

Merely transcribing the Kinsey Report leads to depravity in our nation’s co-eds!

or:

Miss Jenkins prepares to tell Mr. Rose that she spilled coffee on the annual report — again.

or:

To make the boss stand up and notice her work, Joanne wears HUSSY brand shoes.

Doghouse writes: “Either that wallpaper comes off, or I do.”

Wait, can I edit another’s caption suggestion? I’ll take that as a yes.

“Either that wallpaper comes off or my clothes do.”

Easy Spirit Pumps: Looks like you’re nude, feels like a sneaker.

How to Write for Conservative Media (continued):

Step 5: Moisten right index finger in mouth (see figure above).

Step 6: Insert right index fever in rectum.

Step 7: Sit down on office chair and face keyboard, adjusting posture to achieve a comfortable position…

I’m in awe of the cavalier reverse cant of the books on the shelves. Wow, THAT was casual.

p.s. Nice shoes.

Hey, nice wallpaper!!

“May I date-stamp that for you, Pastor?”

(Only unreferenced object. Whatcha gon’ do?)

Get here earlier next time, I guess.
But now that I think about it, M. Bouffant, if that had been the FIRST object referenced, it would be really funny.

Something to say?